Chapter 12

Celeste couldn't find the words to explain her thoughts to Jamie. She wasn't even sure who she was anymore, with him. I'm still alive, she thought as she walked beside him under the blue skies with their scallops of cloud. The light was clear and strong on her face, and Jamie fussed about it, taking her scarf and arranging it so that her skin was better protected. Something strange was happening to her, in her. She was waking up, she realized, and the thought made her laugh out loud.

"Something funny?" Jamie asked. She shook her head, and felt the almost-familiar sensation of a smile spreading across her face.

"Just thinking," she replied. His dark eyebrows lifted and he elbowed her gently, bumping her sideways.

"About what? Have pity on an old man; I'm not the mind reader here."

"Just that I like being with you. I've never liked being around people before."

"You can't judge everything in life by past experience, Celeste. Trust me, babe, there's more between Heaven and Earth than mortals dare to dream." He put an arm across her shoulders, guiding her towards the bus pulling up to the curb. "I happen to have a perfect example of that walking right here beside me."

"I suppose so," she replied, allowing him to steer her onto the crowded bus. She let him find her a seat on the swaying, rumbling conveyance, keeping her fingers lightly clasped on the edge of his coat. She couldn't have imagined any of this. The color, the sound, the sheer reality of the world was overwhelming. She drew herself tight and small into her own mind to avoid being absorbed by the thoughts of others. Sometimes she felt lost, but for now she had a touchstone.

Jamie. She focused on him, wondering what he was thinking, but trying not to invade his thoughts. His face, already familiar from the depths of half-forgotten dreams, was pleasantly blank, giving no clue to what was going on behind those dark eyes. When he glanced down at her and smiled, she smiled back.

She'd asked him if he believed in fate, in predetermined destiny. He didn't, but she did. From the moment he'd pulled her from the icy street, confused and in pain, fighting the exhaustion that had tried to overwhelm her, she'd known who he was. A child's dream of rescue from the ivory tower of isolation, a protector, a friend. He'd proven to be all that, and more.

No dream could have prepared her for the truth of him. His easy generosity, his sudden dark moods that lightened instantly into amused acceptance-- none of it was what she could have imagined. He'd given her a gift, opening an entire new vista of dreams through the simple experience of music, or dancing. He touched her, not with distaste or distance, but with affection. He told her she had a gift.

As if sensing her thoughts, Jamie reached down and took her hand, drawing her to her feet as the bus groaned to a stop.

"We're here," he said cheerfully, making his way towards the doors. The cold, sharp air felt good on her face after the stale warmth of the interior, a playful gust of wind slapping her cheeks and snatching at her curls. She stood patiently under Jamie's hands as he wrapped the scarf back around her head, her eyes wandering. In the doorway of a nearby building something shifted, drawing her attention to a straggly, half-grown calico kitten huddled against the wall.

"What?" Jamie followed her gaze and he shook his head. "It's pitiful the way people throw their pets away when there's shelters to take them in." Celeste wasn't listening, her eyes on the kitten, her thoughts far away, with another kitten that had curled into her hands and died because of her. Without consciously deciding to, she moved away from Jamie, coaxing the kitten away from the wall and picking it up carefully.