I thought to myself, why can't a grown man get his accounts right, I've been in this office for six months and not once has Barry Samuels got the figures to balance and he's an accountant, but I suppose I'll put it right and he'll get the credit, again.
I was mussing over his stupidity when Valerie from over-seas banking came in to my office, she looked, well the only word for it is nervous, she sat beside me, "Pauline would you do me a big, big favour?"
I stopped what I was doing and looked at her, she was a nice girl, a little overly anxious to please men, I suppose a less polite person would call her desperate to get a man, marry and have kids, thank the lord I didn't have any during my six year marriage to the Reverent Lawrence Sharp, I pushed my chair back, "Well what is this big, big favour?"
She squirmed "Well," I looked at her and said, copy cat style, "Well," she took a deep breath, "Well, your off this afternoon aren't you?"
I started to smile, "Yes, why?"
"Eerrrrr I was wondering if you would go somewhere for me," she was looking anywhere but at me.
I tried to be gentle, "I wasn't planning anything special and I think my pussy can look after her self for a few hours," she giggled, I looked at her quizzically, "Anyway go on, it can't be that difficult."
She perked up, "You know Rod in the next office to me."
I nodded, "You mean the dark haired one the other girls call Randy Rod."
She smiled, "Eeerrr yes that's him, well we have been seeing each other and he seems a bit keen and he wants to see me tomorrow night and he, I mean we, want to have a bit of fun," I looked side-ways at her, "A bit of fun, as in?"
She got a little defensive, "Look its all right for you, at this moment in time you say you don't want to be involved but when you do, you are pretty and, well you have the looks and shape that men crave, me well I just want some-one."
I knew I'd been a little too flippant and upset her; I apologized and asked her to say what she wanted.
"He, we want to play some roll play games."
I looked stupidly at her, "I'm afraid I have no idea want your talking about."
She smiled, "You are as naive as they say, you don't know about roll play and sex games," I shook my head but she was right I have always been, shall we say careful in my attitude, I was brought up by a very religious raceme and being a clergy-mans wife and protected in that kind of environment, its left me a little less than worldly wise.
"Well the big favour is," the words suddenly tumbled out of her mouth, "Would you go to this shop, its on your way home and get me those and bring them in tomorrow?" I looked at the glossy paper she had handed me, THE STARLIGHT EROTICA, SEX SHOP and she had pointed at a leather hand restrainer and ankle hobblers; I nearly dropped the book.
"You have got to be joking," I looked at her, she wasn't and she was so embarrassed I suddenly felt sorry for her.
She was just about to start sobbing, her chair went back and she began to stand, I put my hand out, "No, no," I said, "Don't be silly I'll get these, eeerrrr things for you, good lord its only a shop."
She bent forward and planted a kiss on my cheek, "Thank you, oh thank you, here's the money, thank you, must dash," and she turned and almost ran out the office before I had chance to change my mind.
I looked at these goods I had promised to get, it was a thick leather belt with cuff holders fastened to it slightly behind the hip. The ankle straps had a rigid six-inch bar fastened between them, all to daft for me as I took note of the address and stuffed the paper in to my handbag.
It must have been around two when I parked up in a free market car park and set off to find this den of filth.
Down three back streets and up a small dead end alley and there it was, shabby and dirty, I thought that it just summed up the people that go in there, yet here I was pushing the door open.
I small Asian looking man stood putting something on a shelf, he looked at me, stared for a moment, looked me up and down and turned away, I heard voices.
I started to look at the shelves, I was revolted by what I saw, packets of plastic phallic objects with names like, Thunder cock, Pleasure pump and Pussy plunger, I suddenly realised why Valerie had giggled. Things like clips with chains on them and pictures of them on women's nipples or little tiny funnels things with rubber balls on them, a picture on the packet showed them as suction things again on nipples, I was horrified.
Then there were things for men, Big boy pump up tubes and rubbery women's virginal passage's and row upon row of filthy books and videos, all with the most disgusting pictures on the front, I was amazed to see women with men's penis's in their mouths.
The sights and the weird smell in the place had me feeling a little sick when the sound of footsteps and a click made me turn to the door then a voice behind me made me turn back again, it was the little man, "Lady want buy?"
I fumbled in my handbag and pulled out the glossy paper, "eeerrr, its these," I pointed at the two articles.
He smiled, his black teeth looked awful and his breath had such an sweet sickly odour it was nearly overpowering, "Oh special please to follow."
We went towards a thick red curtain and he held it open for me; I peered in. It was a small room with a thick pole in the centre, I assumed for ceiling support, and a door at the other side, a scratching noise came from behind, a guard dog, well its that kind of place but what took my breath away was the walls, they were a mass of the most perverted things I had ever seen.
Rubber hoods, leather harnesses, straps, handcuffs, belts, chains my mind couldn't take it all in. There was a wall covered in what looked like gags, straps with red balls or wide rings, even one with what looked like a mans penis, then there were whips, crops, bats, paddles and canes.
My eyes fell on the restrainers that Valerie had wanted, I pointed, he moved towards them, "Oh yes this what lady want," he picked them off the wall, "You like?"
I blurted out, "Oh there not for me there for a friend."
He laughed, "Oh lady not worry here, we very discreet, you try for get size right."
I was confused the smell was getting to me, it was very scented and making me feel light headed he came over to me with them in his out stretched hand, "Take off coat we try."
I was suddenly aware of a second man, he was behind me, "Please to take off coat, we can't sell if it not right, may have to alter."
I was confused and feeling very giddy, they kept on, "Please to take coat off," "Must make fit," "If lady want to be sexy lady then must be tight."
I just wanted to get out; I started to unbutton my coat, I handed it to the second man who hung it behind a mirror; I looked at myself.
There I was surrounded by all these obscene objects, it was almost laughable, me with my button up the front short sleeve white blouse and long fully buttoned cotton skirt covered in small multi coloured dots and small black court shoes, my hair neatly tied back, I looked like Audrey Hepburn in some sort of dreadful adult perverted movie.
I hadn't noticed before but the room was quite smoky and the smell was getting stronger, for some unknown reason I giggled, silly of me as this belt thing was fastened round my waist and clipped tight. The little man smiled at me, I was trying hard to concentrate as he took my right hand and pulled it slightly behind me and buckled it in to the leather cuff, the same thing was happening to my left wrist.
I pulled and struggled, "Yes that's fine, I'll take it," I expected them to remove the straps but the little man handed the leg thing to the other man and they both knelt at my feet, I tried to move away but they kind of pushed me round until my back was pressing on the post, the smell on incense, that's what it was, incense, was very heavy, I lay back feeling dizzy.
I was aware of the straps on my legs being tightened I came back to reality with a start, "No please no, stop it, its not for me."
They both stood, "You like it, what you want, you like sexy things, make lady sexy."
Was it me or was it him, one of us wasn't making any sense, "I tried harder, "No, listen to me take them off I don't like it, I'm not like that its not for me its for a friend, don't you understand.
The little man turned and picked up this black hood thing. My eyes were heavy and blurred the smell in the room was over powering me but I could still make out what he had in his hand.
It was a full head hood, tiny slits where the eyes and nose would be and a big round O shape at the mouth; like the top of a jar with lugs you could screw things too.
He lifted his other hand with what looked like a wide ring and a rubber balloon shaped thing, it had a thin tube coming out and a little pump on the end, he waved his hands in my face, "See look see these to go with straps, I sell cheap, you have good time with these on, very sexy, make pretty lady feel good, hot and good, yes, you take."
I was still trying to think straight in my confused state I said, "No, no I wouldn't know how to use them, I."
He pulled a small stool from under a shelf and jumped up on it saying, "Me show, it make you feel hot, wet and ready for man."
.... There is more of this story ...