Chapter 3

Once again Sondra busied herself with family matters. Ginger had been given a small part in a school play and Sondra tried to keep her mind occupied with playing chauffeur for the budding actress, baking cookies for Cindy's class bake sale and serving as chairperson for a charity fund raiser. In addition, Brad has twice asked her to meet him for lunch during the past week, a most unexpected and enjoyable break from the housewife routine. She realized that despite the pressures which seemed to be prying them apart, they each still possessed a deep and abiding love for the other. Yet, both times, during a most enjoyable and even intimate moment of sharing, his cell phone had chirped and he, instead of turning it off or suggesting the call be placed later, had interrupted their conversation to take the call, one of which had consumed most of their time together. He apologized, but the hurt she felt could not be fully assuaged, even when he brought her roses that evening.

"I'm sorry about today, I..."

"I really don't want to talk about it."

"Let me apologize, please!" She took the flowers and arranged them in a vase. "Look, it was about the Marston case."

"The embezzler?"

"Alleged embezzler. My investigator had just found a witness we have been looking for and..."

"And it couldn't have waited until after we finished lunch?"

"Well, it's an important witness. He..."

"I really don't care about your witness, Brad. I care about the fact that you are spending more and more time at the office and less and less with the girls and me."

"Honey, you know that I have to..."

"I know this, Brad. I know we're drifting apart a little bit further all the time. I know we don't share..."

"I love you Sondra."

"I know that. And I love you. And i know a lot ofthis is my fault. I know you've sometimes wanted more than I was prepared to give. but thngs have changed. I've changed. IBut most of all, it's not like it used to be. I used to be the center of your life and you were the center of mine. I don't expect the sexual marathons we had when we were first married, but I miss being physically close. I miss the intimacy. I miss having you inside me."

"And you think I don't?"

"Brad, despite having the girls and being a bit standoffish, I've tried to make time for us, but lately you're always too tired or too preoccupied with one of your cases."

"Honey, I know I've spent a lot of time at the firm, but you knew I was going into law when we met."

"I have no problem with your being a lawyer. I want you to be a husband too. No -- I want you to be a husband first!"

"I am."

"No, you're not. the girls and I have been playing second fiddle to the firm for some time now. They're growing up, Brad -- and you and I are growing apart!"

"Sondra, honey, you know I love you and the girls, but I have to make a living. You've never objected to the money i make with the firm -- this house, the swimming pool, the BMW and Volvo, the..."

"I'm not saying you haven't been a good provider. It isn't the money, or lack thereof, it's time Brad. The girls and I don't need more money. We'd even be glad to make do on less if we could just see you more often, be with you, share evenings together."

"Does that include time in the bedroom?" he asked.

"Yes. I've changed Brad. I'm willing to... try some things that I wasn't wiling to try before."

He knew she meant it, just like the other times she had told him she would stop being so hesitant during their lovemaking. What she hadn't told him was that her total loss of control the night she had lost her virginity had created in her fear of going too far -- so far as to be considered aa slut by her husband.

"Look, honey, it's hard. Now that I'm a partner the pressures are even greater than ever. I have to..."

"You have to spend all that time away from us -- or you choose to?"

"It's the same thing."

She knew the conversation was at a dead end. He simply could not or would not understand that he was the one now slowly sacrificing the marriage for the sake of a law firm and reputation in the legal profession.

"I'm going to bed," she stated flatly and started for the stairs.

"Wait!" he cried, moving to take her in his arms. At that moment his phone chirped. Their eyes met and held for a brief moment as he struggled with the conflict, but when he was struck momentarily immobile with indecision, the pain cut her deeply and she turned away.

"Wait, I..." he called, but her back was already to him and she was moving away. There was another chirp and resignedly he flipped open the phone. "Brad Cramer," he answered.

She glanced back, but he was already in an animated conversation about one of his cases, so Sondra walked dejectedly into the kitchen to finish fixing dinner.