Chapter 1

Mrs. Mary De Mille:

It is extremely painful to remember what happen that night in our den. I've always thought of myself as a moral woman. I've had my lapses, I'm thirty-four and my daughter is almost eighteen. Still, despite all the problems, my husband and I have been happily married for eighteen years. I'm not sure that our marriage will survive to our nineteenth anniversary. I desperately wanted another baby; I just never thought that I'd ever be an unwed mother...

I had known my husband all my life, but he didn't know I existed until I seduced him when I was sixteen and he was twenty-two. We both lived in River Oaks, one of the wealthier sections of Houston. He was the local golden boy. He went to the exclusive The Kinkaid School and was a senior when I was in seventh grade. He was all-everything, and of course, my fantasy. After he graduated valedictorian, he played football at Rice. Several polls selected him as an all-America, but since he was in ROTC, he went into the Army instead of the NFL.

He came back to Houston Christmas looking like a modern day cavalier in his Army dress mess uniform but I managed to catch his attention at one of the Christmas parties. (I had what they are now calling a costume malfunction, back then we called it flashing.) I'd just turned sixteen, and was already a junior at The Kinkaid. (I'd skipped fourth grade.) I told him I was a freshman at A&M and he never found out any different until I discovered I might be pregnant three weeks later. I know he didn't want to marry me, but I made it work. He was my sun and my moon, and by any standard, we had a very happy marriage.

The only problem was that since I'd had Kristin so very young, I had trouble getting pregnant when we decided to try again just before my thirtieth birthday. What followed were four years of frustration and tests. Finally, I had micro-surgery to repair some problems with my plumbing, only to begin having wildly erratic menstrual cycles. The doctors recommend that I go on the pill for three months to see if I could get them regulated. When I met Col. Brown, I was on my third month.

I've tried several times to explain my attraction to Col. Brown, and I can't. I know that I love my husband, I would never do anything to hurt him, I'd never dreamed of being unfaithful, but it was like I was Cinderella and Col. Brown was the prince. Saying no simply wasn't an option.

I'd done everything I could to raise Kristin to understand the dangers of getting pregnant before she married, but when I came home from the hospital, I told her that she had the most wonderful opportunity. She was scandalized by what I was saying, but then she hadn't met him. When I told Rodger, my husband, he thought I was playing an elaborate practical joke. He had attended several military soirées where Col. Brown was a guest of honor, and knew his history. He admired him immensely, although they'd never been introduced. My husband isn't easily impressed; he's built the family business to a size where he has personal meetings with Presidents, Princes and Potentates. Generally, they end up marching to his drum. When Col. Brown walked through our front door Rodger looked like he'd been pole axed.

I wasn't surprised when Rodger agreed to leave the room after Col. Brown arrived at our house. We Americans have the idea that all men are equal, and they should be as far as rights and the law is concerned, but Col. Brown has no equal. I spoke with Dr. Dickson at Walter Reed. I've heard her theory that out of all the billions of males on the planet somehow he is the #1 male by any measure, by orders of magnitude. I don't understand all that, I just know that I was bowled over by just meeting him.

When I asked Rodger about it later he said, "I had always believed that if I couldn't win a fight, I could hurt the other guy enough that he'd back off. That whatever he won, wouldn't be worth the cost I'd force him to pay to win. I'd make sure the other guy knew fighting me would, at best be a Pyrrhic victory. When Col. Brown walked in, I knew I couldn't win, and my best shot wouldn't faze him. What was worse, since I'd seen him in person several times I wasn't prepared for the force of his personality one-on-one. He was just overwhelming. I would have gone after any other many with knives, guns or brass knuckles, with him, I was almost ready to give support him. I was actually grateful that he wasn't going to make me watch what I was willing to allow."

I was grateful Col. Brown sent Rodger away too. I was acting like a preteen around a rock star, and I didn't want my husband to see that. When Col. Brown left to get Kristin, I went upstairs to get ready. I still wasn't positive he was going to be willing to get me pregnant, but I wanted to be prepared. First, I showered, and I took my time washing. In fact, I was so careful washing my twat that it almost constituted masturbation. I didn't think that Col. Brown would go down on me, but I'd been smelling myself ever since I'd met him, and I wanted to be fresh. I then took a long soak in a bubble bath using scented oils. I shaved my legs and under my arms. For the first time, I was tempted to shave my twat. Roger had asked me to do that once, but I had resisted. I had a horror of being in a car accident and having someone else see me that way, and yes my mother always insisted that I have clean underwear on before I left the house. I actually had the razor poised when I decided that I didn't want Rodger to know that I'd done that for someone else when I wouldn't do it for him.

After my bath, I redid my make-up and hair. Then I had to decide what to wear. I have a few Victoria's Secrets outfits, but I didn't have the courage to wear them. Besides, those were for my husband and I didn't want to give that, even to Col. Brown. I thought about several dresses, but I wanted to show off my figure and the only ones I had that did that were not something you'd wear around the house.

Finally, I decided on a jacket and trouser outfit by Bernard Zins. The trousers were loden green with full leg and a regular raise waist. They didn't have pockets and I thought they showed that I wasn't carrying any extra weight. I chose an almost black Dana Buchman pullover blouse that make it clear that I wasn't wearing a bra, and would allow easy access to my very average boobs. The jacket was a black and white tweed with a notched collar and three buttons. The jacket would let me cover what the blouse showed if Col. Brown was only interested in Kristen. I didn't own a thong. In the past if I didn't want to show a panty line I would normally wear pantyhose. Tonight was not a night for pantyhose. Feeling a bit guilty, I borrowed one of Kristin's thongs. When I finished dressing I thought I looked as good as I could for someone my age. I added some aquamarine and diamond earrings, a wide gold bracelet and almost added a necklace and broach before I remembered that it might get in the way. I finished the package with few drops of Sabi Parfum to make me irresistible.

My timing was almost perfect; I had just gone into the guest bedroom to turn down the sheets when I heard Kristin arrive. I called her to help me and we lit some incense sticks and a few candles. I wasn't actually that big on incense or candles, but I had a horror that Col. Brown might make our baby in our marriage bed and the incense and candles would be a good excuse. I didn't want to share that bed with anyone else. I know that sounds irrational, but somehow I was able to separate getting pregnant from lovemaking and from my marriage. I was doing my best to seduce the man, but I knew that after I was pregnant, I'd only want my husband.

We'd just finished when Edna and Johnny arrived. Edna looked radiant, as all brides look, but I think the idea of creating a new life with Col. Brown gave her a special glow. Johnny didn't look happy, but that was certainly understandable. It was horrible timing, but that was just the way things worked out sometimes. I was trying not to be discouraged by her. I had no doubt that Col. Brown could get two women pregnant in one night, but would he want to? Kristin had already told me that he wasn't going to be with her tonight, but what about me? I would be honored to have Edna use our house, but I didn't want to be overlooked.

I knew about men's fantasy of having two women at the same time, and I was determined that if that was the only way I could get what I wanted I would be the third wheel. I was trying to visualize what that would entail when the doorbell rang. Kristin rushed to open it and I stood there in the foyer as he walked in.

I know that many women have fantasies about working in a brothel, I never have. The idea of walking out with my "sisters" to stand in front of a customer hoping to be picked is nightmarish. Yet that is exactly how I felt as he entered the foyer and closed the door behind him. Kristin walked over and stood by me I knew she wanted to take my hand. I on the other hand, was trying not to do a hip thrust while pushing out my breasts. I was wishing I'd worn my wonder bra, or something more daring than the thousand-dollar outfit I had on.

Col. Brown looked at us and he shuddered with need. I was standing there with two other women and suddenly I felt like the most desired woman in history. My need for him hit me with a force I couldn't comprehend. Being wanted has always turned me on, but I've never felt this needed in my life. It seemed a life or death matter, and I knew that while this man could have any woman in the world, it was me that he needed, desired. I felt my twat swell with moisture and my nipples pushed against the silk of my blouse. I walked to him and I turned to jelly as I felt his arms encircle me.

Just as my nipples made contact with his shirt, he thrust me away and looked disgusted. He looked at me like you might look at a strange dog's poop on your sidewalk. He yelled about having sperm in me and I wanted to deny it, but Rodger and I had made love on Tuesday night. I was horrible embarrassed to admit that, but mortified to discover that it meant he wasn't going to give me a child. When he talked about six days, I was determined to douche in the wild hope that I might be 'clean' by tomorrow before he left.

I was so focused on that that I almost missed what he said next. He called me a slut, something that I'd never been called, even when I was pregnant at sixteen. Then he was telling me that I had to audition with Johnny! I was so mortified that it wasn't until after he left that the other shoe dropped for me. I was going to have to 'audition' in the den. The den where Rodger was watching TV!

The others began moving towards the den, but I stood there in shock. Realizing that I needed to talk to Rodger before they arrived I asked if they knew where we could find one of the dirty movies we'd been instructed to watch. Edna said she had a DVD in her suitcase that she'd been given as a gag gift. Johnny volunteered to go get it.

I begged Kristin and Edna to give me a few minutes with Rodger alone before they joined us. Then I hustled to see if I could get my husband to go to the library while we used the TV room.

When I entered I saw him staring, eyes fixed on the Fox News Network. I was afraid that he might look diminished after Col. Brown, but he didn't. He was the same strong man I'd married.

I came over and knelt down beside his chair and said, "Honey, do you think you could go into the library for a little while."

I paused trying to think of a way to explain what was happening and he answered in a whisper, "I've been ordered to stay here and be quiet, I won't leave unless he changes those orders. Surly there are enough rooms for you to use without coming in here. Is he going to give Kristin a baby too?"

I felt an invisible hand clutch my heart, "No, he's going to wait until she's eighteen."

I paused and I felt him relax a bit.

Then he said, "He's a good man, but I almost wish he wouldn't wait, I'd like to see both babies born around the same time. I appreciate him not taking you in our bedroom, when he comes in, I'm sure he'll let me go to bed. I'll ask if I can take my eighteen year old Glenfiddich Scotch with me."

He looked at me intently, his eyes burning holes into my brain, I hadn't been this scared or upset since that morning I'd sat on the commode about to learn I was pregnant.

I wanted to cry at the pain I saw in his face, but his voice was even when he continued, "Mary, I'm going to get so drunk that I won't remember a thing that happened after I got home. I know I get amorous when I get drunk, so if I do anything to you tonight, I want you to forgive me if I don't remember it."

I could feel the tears rolling down my cheek, I tried twice to form words but my throat wouldn't work. I couldn't meet his eyes any more and I looked away.

"I'm not going to be leaving this room tonight either. I, uh, I'm not presentable right now for him. I... uh..." I broke down crying and Rodger picked me with his incredible strength and set me gently onto his lap.

Wrapping his arms around me he said gently, "Is it something we can fix? Will he come back for you?"

I nodded my head still unable to speak. Rodger voice showed relief, "I've got to say I'm glad he's not going to be with you tonight. I'll make it a point to travel a lot in the next couple of months that'll make it a lot easier on me too. I don't want to know when it's going to happen, it'll be easier if I can pretend it never happened."

My heart was breaking and my soft sobs turned to horrible wracking boohoos, great gasping things that would have been melodramatic if my pain had been any less.

"Rodger," I managed at last gaining a small measure of control, "He's going to give Edna a baby. He feels terrible about doing that to Johnny on his wedding night, and so he's given me to Johnny, in here! He thinks I'm a slut!"

I felt every muscle in Rodger's body tighten, and I heard a growl of pain and fury deep in his chest. I felt his body prepare to bound from his easy chair and I automatically rolled out of it so he could. He began to hyperventilate as he struggled to rise. I threw myself to my knees beside his chair. I took his right hand in mine and bathed it in my tears.

"Please don't Rodger, I don't want to lose you."

I managed to mumble my chest heaving as I cried. I couldn't stand for him to blame himself for his inability to act.

I knew every fiber of his being wanted to challenge Col. Brown and we both knew that would be fruitless. It would only humiliate him more than what was already happening It wasn't until much later when we realized that had he challenged Col Brown, he would have cancelled his orders.

I've often used the phrase, "I'd give my right arm..." At that moment, I would not have suffered a severed limb. However, I literally would rather have been horse whipped than what Col. Brown was forcing me to do. Yet, I didn't have the will even to oppose him, to ask him to relent. I didn't know if my willingness to do this was based on my desire for a child by him, a grandchild by him or simply because he'd ordered me to do this horrible thing in front of my husband. I knew I had no desire to ever 'be' with anyone but Rodger sexually, yet whatever the source of my motivation to follow Col. Brown's orders it was stronger than my will, and best intentions. I would hate every second, but I would do it.

I'd like to think that I might have found some way to succeed in my struggle to oppose what Col. Brown had ordered, but at that moment Kristin, Edna and Johnny came into the room. Carefully ignoring Rodger and me, the newly weds sat on the couch between the two easy chairs in our home theater room. I went to the bathroom and tried to repair my make-up while Kristin got everything set up to play the DVD.

My tears under control, but my make-up hopeless, I went to my recliner to the left of the couch, carefully not looking at the three on the couch or Rodger in his recliner on the other side. The "movie" started and it was as bad as you might expect. It was triple X and thankfully the dialogue was skimpy at best. It mostly consisted of a couple trying to see just how many positions they could try out. As a honeymoon gag it was perfect, as something to watch in that situation it was horrible.

I couldn't help but see, out of the corner of my eye, that Edna and Johnny were getting into it. His hands were roaming, but carefully above the waist. She had opened her blouse and unhooked her bra. Even doing my best not to watch, it was far more erotic than what was on our wide screen.

Even if I hadn't been able to see it, no one could miss the sounds as he began to suckle her. I heard him ask if she could cum from what he was doing and she shook her head. I couldn't hear what he whispered but she shook her head again.

There was more discussion and I heard him say, "Please I want you to cum for me before you go to him."

The sounds of his suckling started again and Edna added new sounds of her own passion. I glanced over and saw that she was using her own hand to stimulate herself through her pants. I turned to watch, not because of any voyeuristic desire, but because I knew it would be seconds before I was take her place. She shuddered and pushed Johnny away. I was almost certain she hadn't had an orgasm, but she wanted to get away from Johnny before there was any danger he might have one. She couldn't take any chances that a premature release might contaminate her with his sperm.

She shot me a look of pain, then a silent plea that I wasn't sure I understood. I knew she didn't want me to be with Johnny, but I think she wanted him to be so occupied that he wouldn't think about what she was doing upstairs. I tried to convey in my smile that while I was going to do this, I had no desire for her husband.

Aloud I said, "Edna, I think that perhaps you might be more comfortable waiting in my chair, why don't we switch places?"

I didn't have to look at Rodger to see the tears on his cheeks. I had never seen Rodger cry and it was like a knife twisting in my guts rolling my intestines into knots. He was carefully centering his entire attention on the TV, but when I lowered my footrest to get out of my recliner, I saw him squeeze his eyes shut.

Edna had been sitting in the middle of the couch next to Kristin. I couldn't do that and motioned for Johnny to move over letting me sit next to what was now Kristin's chair. He reached over, squeezed Kristin's hand and made a space for me to sit next to him.

I was only thirty-four, but Johnny had been coming over to our house since he was in pre-school. Edna and Kristin had been friends and soccer teammates forever. Edna and Johnny were only a year ahead of Kristin in school, and despite what I'd just seen, I couldn't think of him as anything other than the little kid I'd made jelly sandwiches. I couldn't believe that I was sitting down next to him to be a wife substitute.

It wasn't until that second that I remembered that Col. Brown had said he wanted me, "leaking from all three places," or he wouldn't be back for me or for Kristin. I do oral for Rodger all the time. I've never let him come in my mouth, and I don't do deep throat. I tried once but I ended up throwing up. Still, as long as he doesn't force it too deep, I enjoy it. I like the way it gets him excited. My girlfriends think it's odd that I don't like him to go down on me. I'm so sensitive down there that his tongue tickles me, and I'm so scared I might pee on him; it makes me a nervous wreck.

Now, I was going to have to let Johnny cum in my mouth, and something I've never done with Rodger-- anal! I did let him try once, but it hurt me so much, even before he got it in that he stopped without my asking. I was so grateful, his concern for my feelings is one of the things I love about him. Now I was going to have to accept that pain from Johnny. What's more I was going to have to do it with my husband in the same room. Somehow, I was going to have to find a way to keep from showing that pain or it would kill Rodger, or he'd kill Johnny!

We sat on the couch for several minutes watching the DVD. The machine was set to repeat, but was so monotonous that I wasn't sure if it had yet. Johnny's hands were in his lap and mine were in mine. I was so upset just thinking about what I had to do, that I was almost trembling. Because I was distracted, it took me several minutes to realized that Johnny was trying to edge away from me, our hips weren't touching anymore.

I'm almost never an aggressor with Rodger. I don't have to be. Frankly, I love the feeling of being wanted and I always respond to it. I took a deep breath, and shifted, trying not to let Kristin see what I was doing. There was no way I could make mad unrestrained sex, much less wild if unwanted adultery, with my daughter sitting on the same couch with me.

"Kristin, do you think that you could bring your father that special bottle of Scotch from the bar? The one in the round tube, and while you're up would you bring me a light blanket? I'm afraid I'm a little cold. And, uh, you might want to bring yourself a cushion, I'm feeling a bit tired and I might stretch out here on the couch."

It was the thinnest fiction, but it was the best I could do. I'd never seen Rodger drink to get drunk, but I hoped it wouldn't take him long. I decided we'd wait until he passed out, and Edna left. Even if Kristin was still in the same room, I could use the blanket to hide what I was doing from her. As she left, I switched sides, so I could turn my back to Rodger when the expected began.

What I didn't expect was for Johnny to lean over a whisper him my ear, "Mrs. D, I hate what I'm going to do. I don't ever want another woman except Edna, but he told me I have to use you when I want Edna, that I have to cum in you. This is making me sick at my stomach, especially in to do it front of Mr. D and Edna but I don't have a choice." He made a sound that was half a choke and half a sob, "Him wanting Edna makes me kind of proud in a strange way, and we wanted children right away. It's why we were getting married so young; with our trust funds, it's not like we have to wait until I can earn a living. I'm sorry as hell about our wedding night, and I resent that he made me come here with her, but this... with you, is sick; it's like doing it with my mom."

I understood exactly what he was saying, and would have told him so if I wasn't holding my tongue between my teeth to avoid making a sound. As soon as he'd moved to whisper in my ear, his hand had moved to cup my right breast. When he finished talking, he moved down to kiss my neck. At the touch of his lips I jumped so hard I almost bit my tongue off. I was as rigid as a board, and I felt like if I moved I'd shatter, shooting splinters all over the room. I turned my head fractionally and I could see the muscles in Rodger's jaw clench and unclench.

My right hand flew to cover my mouth, like a little girl who accidentally said a bad word. Although Rodger was staring straight ahead, I know he was watching. His lips began to move and I knew he was cursing under his breath. He'd been told to be quiet and he was following orders, but he was scaring me. Johnny began to fondle my breast and my nipple. Because of the coolness of the room that nipple was already hard. I couldn't bear the thought that Rodger might think I was responding to Johnny. Johnny was trying to be sexy, but while he wasn't hurting me, it felt like the technician positioning me for my last mammogram. He kissed my neck, right below my ear, a place I've hated to be kissed since a boy, whose name I've mercifully forgotten, licked me there in the sixth grade. At that time I'd run screaming to the teacher for a towel to wipe off the germs. With Johnny, it made my skin crawl and I wanted to turn and bite his head off.

I took a deep mental breath. This wasn't going to work, I not only had to get very intimate, I had to do a good job. Johnny was enough of a gentleman that he'd no doubt be very complimentary of my "performance" even if I acted like a dead log. However, I knew right down to my bones that he would be honest, to a fault, when he answered questions by Col. Brown, no matter what its effect on Kristin and me. I'd never been good at faking passion; Rodger was so good I didn't have to. He could still make me wet just by locking eyes and cocking an eyebrow wickedly.

I suddenly had a horrible image of what my future would be like if I were to go through with all this only to have Col. Brown use my lack of enthusiasm as a reason not to give Kristin and me a baby! The thought didn't do a thing for my passion but it did wonders for my motivation. Rodger could only forgive what I was doing if we won in the end. I glanced at him again, and he was the picture of a man absorbed in a TV show - except for those muscles clenching and un-clenching in his jaw. I used my right hand to adjust my jacket to shield what Johnny was doing to my breast. It was the smallest of fig leaves, but it let me pretend that Rodger didn't see. I bit my lower lip and tried to enjoy the mauling of my boob.

It only took a second to realize that would never work. As soon as I opened my jacket, Johnny began jiggling my boob like it molded Jell-O. I pressed my jacket into his hand, forcing him to stop playing with me like the kid he was. His response was to pinch my nipple, something else that I hate. They are so sensitive I can barely stand to have Rodger lick them. I love the feeling when he takes in a mouthful of me and that sort of hard contact, but pinching them is just painful, not sexy. I couldn't contain a small yelp and I saw Rodger whip his head around, his eyes boring holes into Johnny. He didn't say anything, he just stared hard, his eyes narrowing, his lips thinning.

I didn't have to hear him say the words, 'That's my woman you're manhandling and if you hurt her you'll answer to me, ' to get the message loud and clear.

I felt Johnny tense and I heard him swallow hard. I had to grab his hand to keep him from moving it off my breast.

When I did, I saw Rodger nod curtly to Johnny turn back and resume his fascination with the second or third showing of the very short porn DVD. Johnny acknowledging that I wasn't a toy, unceremoniously and a bit defiantly moved his hand from my breast to my legs. I had them crossed but he jammed his hand between them a few inches below my crotch. The last thing I needed was for Johnny to take out his anger at Rodger's rebuke on me. I was determined that we would never see Johnny or Edna after this night, but I couldn't afford for the two men to erupt into open warfare.

As Johnny pushed harder I uncrossed my legs and allowed his hand to shoot up and cup my mound. He was gouging me, and it was very uncomfortable. I felt my face turn scarlet as something in Johnny's body language let me know Rodger was watching Johnny's hand touch me where no one but Rodger had ever touched me. I'm not sure what I would have done if Kristin hadn't finally gotten back with Rodger's Scotch and a light blanket for me. She hadn't brought a cushion for herself, instead she had a small pillow and second light blanket. She wrapped herself up, turned her back to us and pretended to be trying to go to sleep. For the first time since Johnny had touched me, I looked over at Edna. She had tears streaming down her face and mouthed, "Sorry," when she saw me looking at her.

Johnny had his back to her but some reaction from me must have let him know what Edna was doing. He turned and looked at her.

She whispered, "Not like that Johnny, Mrs. D doesn't deserve that, don't make it harder on her. You understand what I need to do, I understand what you need to do, and what she has to do for Kristin. It's not her fault."

Johnny actually blushed, the pressure on my twat stopped being hostile. Twisting so I had my back to my husband I covered us both in the blanket then I pulled him to me and gave him the best kiss I had. I let my tongue slip between his lips and tenderly explored his mouth. When his tongue responded I did my best to caress it. Steeling my nerve, I moved my right hand down to his crotch and I felt his erection. He broke our kiss and gave me the funniest expression. It took me several seconds to understand. I realized that Col. Brown had said I was a slut, and Johnny was afraid he didn't 'measure up.'

I leaned into him, pressed my mouth to his ear and whispered so that only he could hear, "It's very nice, I'm going to enjoy my time with this."

I gave it a gentle squeeze.

I felt him relax. Johnny had no way of knowing that this was only the second penis I had ever taken into my hand. It was a little smaller than my husband's, but I had no idea if it was nice or not.

I whispered, "Johnny, I'm not a slut, I never have been; you'll be my second. I would never do this except for Col. Brown, but it is going to happen so let's just make the best of it."

I felt him relax a little more, and his finger caressed my slit through my designer slacks. Now, his touch was different... firm but gentle. I sighed very softly, I wasn't being turned on yet, but at least he'd stopped turning me off. I sensed motion behind me and twisted just enough to see my husband take another long swig from his bottle. He wasn't chugging it, quite, but it was a heck of a way to treat two-hundred dollar a bottle Scotch.