Part 12: Fridayella

Once upon a time there lived a handsome widower and his daughter. All was serene until, one day, the widower returned home from business trip with a new wife. At first everything was sweetness and light; the new wife, who was a widow with two daughters, was more than pleasant towards the daughter. Soon however the new wife was demanding more and more from the handsome husband and to show his love for her the handsome husband spent more and more time away on business trips to earn the money to get the things that the new wife, and eventually, her daughters demanded.

The more time the handsome husband spent away from home the nastier the new wife became towards the daughter. She named her Fridayella [for reasons that are unclear to me - but that's how it is with stories of this nature, you'll just have to live with it] and encouraged her daughters to be nasty to Fridayella too. And so it came that the two daughters became the Ugly Sisters and the new wife became the Evil Stepmother and the handsome husband suffered a terrible accident and Fridayella started her new life of scapegoat and servant for the rest of them.

Every day the Evil Stepmother and her two Ugly Sisters went out of their way to make Fridayella's life a misery. But they were wasting their time; the hard work kept her figure trim and improved her muscle definition. The simple food, that was all she was allowed to eat, kept her skin clear and all the while the memory of her father's love kept her disposition sweet. In short she blossomed in adversity, in the way that wildflowers are wont to do.

Of course the more beautiful she grew, the worse the treatment of her became and the worse their treatment of her became, the more ugly became the Ugly Sisters and the more shrewish became the Evil Stepmother. [I really will have to give up writing these compound sentences; I always get lost halfway through, so Lord knows what it's like for the readers!] And now, though she did but know it, Fridayella is one of prettiest young women in all the kingdom. This enraged the Ugly Sisters and so they determined to keep her away from the rest of society in case her beauty would overshadow theirs (as it most assuredly would). [I thought I was going to write more simply - oh well don't blame me, I'm only the writer.]

The Ugly Sisters had expensive tastes and so to make their income stretch further the Evil Stepmother refused to replace Fridayella's clothes as they wore out and by now she spends her waking hours naked and covered in the dust and the grime that is the natural result of cleaning up after the Evil Stepmother and her atrocious daughters.

["You just had to, didn't you?"]

[The author looks innocently about him, "Had to, what?"]

["Keep me naked, what else?"]

["Every job has its downside..."]

["I'd consider very carefully where you're going with that particular piece of irony buster!"]

["... and this isn't one of them!"]

["Nice recovery."]

["I thought so. Anyhow it gets better..."]

["Good, when does the Fairy Godmother show up?"]

["... or worse depending on your perspective."]

["I'm warning you!"]

["Undeniably pleasant though it is to converse with one's delightfully undressed heroine, I do think we should be getting along, don't you?"]

["Mmmmph!"]

Fridayella was now reflecting on the latest fiendish twist in the continuing attempts to make her life unbearable. The Evil Stepmother now insisted that Fridayella should wear a small ball-gag during the daylight hours! Now that Fridayella was almost permanently naked she had taken to fitting Fridayella with a chastity belt made from some straps and a dildo that Fridayella had also to wear during the daylight hours. And so it was that Fridayella was outfitted like this on the fateful day and night of the Prince's Annual State Ball. Every year all eligible women were required, by the King, to attend the ball in a, so far, vain attempt to find his son a wife. On this night Fridayella was made to help the Ugly Sisters get ready for the ball. Of course Fridayella had nothing to wear, but she wasn't downhearted she was just anxious for her Stepsisters to leave so she could have some time to herself. As the noisome pair and their mother left the house Fridayella unbuckled her gag and threw it onto the table.

["I suppose you think that's funny?"]

["I'll allow that it does have certain humorous aspects." The author gives way to a few deep chuckles.]

["I'll get you for this!"]

["Oh well, enough of this badinage, don't you want to go to the ball?"]

["I don't have a thing to wear!"]

["That must be the first time you've said that when it's actually true!"]

["Oh yes, just you wait, revenge will be sweet."]

Just then a shower of stardust announced the arrival of the Fairy Godmother. The fluffy, bunny slippers that she wore gave a clue as to the current identity of the Fairy Godmother. The Fairy Godmother looked at Fridayella and pursed her lips; she tutted and then sucked some air through her teeth and shook her head in the way that mechanics do and you just know that you are not going to like the final bill.

"The chassis is good, but the bodywork could do with some dressing up."

"Pardon."

"Uh sorry, I mean that chastity belts are not the 'in thing' this year. First though we should get you some transport."

The Fairy Godmother cast around for something to work with. Muttering to herself she pulled a large courgette (oh all right then a squash - look, as far as I am concerned squash is a fruit drink made by adding water to concentrated fruit juice) from the vegetable rack.

"I know pumpkins are traditional, but I think this will do." Taking the courgette the Fairy Godmother beckoned Fridayella to follow her out into the yard; "I do my best work with an audience." Out in the yard the Fairy Godmother collected together the cat and the dog and finally herded a few mice towards the courgette that lay sphinx-like on the ground.

"What are you? A Fairy Godmother or some sort of demented Pied Piper?"

"Now dear, be patient." The Fairy Godmother looked critically at the assembled ingredients and tutted again, "I suppose it will just have to do." With that she waved her magic wand, "Higgledy Piggledy Parabaloo*" [*A special prize goes to the person that can tell me from where this magical incantation is stolen.] (If I had a special effects budget to rival the GDP of a small South American republic I could probably do justice to the magic, but I don't so you'll just have to make do!) The courgette grew and changed into a fairytale carriage, the mice grew enormously and became four prancing grey stallions complete with all the regalia that befits a princess. Finally the cat and the dog metamorphosed into a coachman and a footman. The Fairy Godmother dusted her hands and turned to Fridayella with the look of a skilled craftsman pleased with a difficult job well done. "Well I'm glad to see I haven't lost my touch. In you get dear and have a wonderful time at the ball."