Chapter 65: Panic

by Kathy R.

Martha felt suddenly shy as Mr. Browning assisted her out of the trunk of his car. She liked his trunk. It wasn't very roomy, but it was comfortably warm. Right now, standing here staring up at the courthouse, she wanted nothing more than to crawl back into that comfy place. She wasn't going to have very much fun today. She didn't even know why Mr. Fielding needed her here today. She thought he could prosecute his son well enough, on his own.

"Stop balking, Martha. It won't be so bad." Mr. Browning, her wonderful host and father of her best friend and lover, Julie, coaxed her forward. He wasn't being short or terse with her at all. He used kindness and gentleness with her. She appreciated that, and did her best to respond quickly and efficiently to his gentle prompting. Now, though, it was harder, since she truly didn't want to be here.

Julie leaned over to Martha and whispered in her ear. "I'll out here waiting for you, rooting you on and giving you silent encouragement. Now go, you'll do fine." Julie tugged at Martha's blouse, playfully. Martha was too distracted, though, to really notice.

'Fine?' Martha repeated to herself. She'd do better if nonparticipating women, like Julie, were allowed in the building. If that much was permitted, she'd be more at ease. But, no-o-o-o. She would be, as far as she knew, the only female in the courtroom today.

Then she saw another small figure -- Mrs. Fielding. The other, older woman stared back at Martha, her dark eyes showing her fear also. The younger dark-skinned woman took a step closer to the older white-skinned woman. Oh, how she needed the support of another such person at this very moment. But, it wasn't meant to be, for with a second step, she reached the end of her tether.

She mewed, audibly, at having been denied the closeness of the other female -- the comforting presence of her own kind. 'Those brown eyes, ' she thought to herself. 'Those sad brown eyes reflecting the terror of being in a male-dominant courthouse and watching her own son being convicted of what should be a petty crime but, instead, was being made into a major event.

A tug on the leash brought Martha back to Mr. Browning's side. For this day only, she hated being forced to be obedient. She wanted so badly to escape. To be her own person. To just... be. Be whatever she wanted, wherever she wanted, without a man around to keep her in line. She sighed, knowing this to be a ridiculous wish and impossible to achieve.

Her host, Mr. Browning heard the sigh, but thought it only in resignation to the fact that she couldn't get out of entering the building. "Martha, it will give you an opportunity many women will never have -- entry into the male world. And to top it off, you are not here to service men, but to assist a male oriented government in prosecuting one of its' own."

She looked up at him and realized he was right. This was an opportunity of a lifetime, though she did almost wish her presence here today was to service the men. At least that way, she'd be at ease and would confidently go about her duties as taught to her over the years. She would just have to allow herself to be ushered along by the males and hope she didn't embarrass herself or Misters Browning and Fielding.

The room smelled strongly of musk. Martha was almost dizzy from the heady smell and wondered if Mrs. Fielding was suffering the same. The two women were kept separate, Martha figured this was to keep the women from plotting. Though, plotting against whom or what, she didn't know.

There was no activity in the room, just the last of the men settling into place. This gave time for her to look around the massive, cavernous room. The building itself was huge -- a labyrinth that Martha knew she would immediately be lost in, if it weren't for the leash. The halls, the doorways, even the windows were all ornately decorated and polished to a fine even sheen.

There were statues everywhere, one even showed a woman wearing a blindfold with a plague underneath. The plaque stated that justice was blind to everyone, no matter who he be or what he is. Martha laughed, knowing that history had changed the plaque to suit the needs of the men. Her laughter drew angry stares from the men and Mr. Browning, holding firm to her leash, gave her a look that meant she was to be disciplined later on for her unwelcome and unladylike outburst.

Martha sat directly behind Mr. Fielding, but separate from the gallery of spectators. The elder Mr. Fielding barely acknowledged her presence, which caused Martha to feel even more nervous and alone. She moped and began shuffling her feet in boredom, tired of waiting for the trial to begin.

Finally, a sedate male entered the courtroom with Tommy Fielding in tow -- and obviously cuffed. He led Tommy to a seat off to the side, not too far from Martha and Mr. Fielding, his father. Then from a door behind the tall desk that would seat the judge, a second male entered the room, also looking sedate. "Where are the females?" The second male demand.

Martha was too busy staring at the horrible Tommy Fielding to notice that anyone was speaking. No, she hadn't forgotten one small detail of this young man. She'd managed to remember everything about him -- right down to the crazed and very sadistic look in his eyes. She shivered, wishing again that she wasn't here today -- or any day.