Chapter 24

The meeting with Abigail had been tense, but in the end, with a major push on the part of Lana, the decision was made to make the trek up to Phoenix. I wasn’t thrilled with the idea, but secretly I had long wanted, needed, to see my son. He might not be my son in any real sense of the word anymore; I was aware of that, and it saddened me big time. But, I needed to at least meet him, see him.

And yes, the decision having been made to go, I did the manly thing: I cried my eyes out, and Lana comforted me. Thank God the other woman was gone by then.

The drive up in my twenty-one year-old Silverado was quiet most of the way. But as we neared our goal she opened up to me.

“Sam, they’re your children and only yours. Yes, the man adopted them as you’ve told me more than once, but that’s just a legal thing not a real thing. You and your ex are the parents. And you really do need to add yourself to the mix,” she said.

“I don’t know, Lana. Hearing them call that man daddy is a real tough nut for me. It’s why I left in the first place, well, part of the reason,” I said.

“I know, but you’re in the wrong in this case. Or, maybe not in the wrong, but guilty of mistaken resolution. Whatever they allow you, take it. So you’re second in line. He’s the one that has to consider who the real father is. He may convince himself that it’s him, even talk the kids into calling him that, buy them off, whatever; but you have evidence that he will never have, not ever,” she did.

“I don’t know, maybe.

“It’s just real hard. I mean me in a wheelchair and the not the pretty face I used to be; well, it’s just hard,” I said.

“I know, sir, I know,” she said.

We’d called before coming and it had been Lana who had in the end made the call. We would be there early Friday evening. I had asked Lana to make the case that she and I would be more comfortable staying at a motel, but evidently Abigail almost had a fit putting that idea out to pasture. We’d be spending the night in the Cord guest house. I’d been on the point of arguing the point, but Lana had accepted the offer without even looking at me or asking my opinion on the matter.

The guest house, the same one they’d long ago asked me to make my home in was a nice place. Smallish compared to castle Cord of course, but that suited me just fine. Two bedrooms, two baths, it even had a one car garage. It had been where my truck had been parked for so long after I’d gone overseas and she had dumped me for the money man. It would be parked there again, now.

We pulled in in front of the main entrance to the two story castle and were immediately met by the master of the house.

“Hello, Sam,” said Owen. “And this must be Lana? I’m Owen Cord.”

“Nice to meet you, sir,” she said. The man smiled.

“Shall we?” he said, indicating that we should go inside.

Dinner was good, well, okay very good. They had a cook, a Filipino guy who really knew how to put food together. That they were putting on the dog for us did not impress me. I saw it as rubbing our nose in their prosperity as opposed to our poverty. But, okay, sour grapes or not, I didn’t much care for the show. I would have preferred hot dogs or hamburgers.

The kids were at the table with us of course. I kept getting looks from the twins who had greeted me once we’d come into the house, and had given me kisses on the cheek, no doubt under orders from Abigail. Ronald was sitting by his daddy, and I don’t mean me. My son never even looked up to see me. Well he was only seven and likely very shy.

To be fair, I had been given a heads up about the situation from Abigail. Her reasoning was the truth that since my son had never even met me—all my fault of course—that we needed to go a bit slower with him than might be the case with the twins who didn’t know me all that much better themselves. I had acquiesced to her suggestion, request, whatever it was.

After dinner I found myself out on the patio flanked by Lana and Abigail. I was informed that Owen was inside explaining things to Ronald. I was also informed that they would be out shortly, and a proper introduction would be happening. I guess they figured that waiting till after dinner was a useful tactical move. I had to allow that it probably was.

“It might be a little bit, Sam, before they come out. Well, I mean...” said Abigail.

“No, it’s all right. I understand,” I said. “Frankly I really don’t care. Whatever works.” Abigail’s look was pure irritation.

“Honey, I’m right here with you,” said Lana sensing my anxiety.

“Thanks, Babe, I really need you right now too,” I said. She nodded.

There was a rustling of movement behind us.

And then I was face to face with my son. I had been across the table form him at dinner, but this was somehow different, very different.

“Hello, sir,” said my beautiful boy.

“Well, and hello to you too, Ronald,” I said. He was skittish, but he came to me and gave me a not too enthusiastic hug. Well, I was used to that from adults let alone a seven year-old boy who was seeing a monster in front of him. It was clear to me that he wanted to be anywhere but with me.

After the hug, he retreated to his dad. Owen looked really unnerved. I actually felt sorry for the man, go figure.

There was a picnic table some yards off in the yard. My chair wasn’t the most mobile of vehicles on turf, but I made it out there, and waited to see if the boy would follow. He did, but slowly. Owen and the women hung back on the patio, but close enough that the boy would feel safe. Man did I feel like shit.

I posted myself at the end of the table in my chair of course. Ronald for his part took a seat on one of the benches a little farther away from me than he might have had I had a face. I didn’t so he didn’t, sit closer to me that is.

“You know who I am, Ronald?” I said, in my most kid friendly voice.

“Yes sir, Daddy says you’re my dad too,” he said. I smiled. Well, he had been informed of the reality of things.

“Yes, but we’ve never met,” I said.

“No sir,” he said.

“Ronnie, can I call you Ronnie?” I said. He nodded.

“My face is kind of scary, huh,” I said. He shook his head.

“It’s okay. I know it’s a little scary. I got it in the Army,” I said. “Did you know that?”

“Yes sir, Mommy told me you were a hero in the Army,” he said.

“Well, I am very glad to meet you,” I said. “I have so wanted to talk to you.”

He was kind was looking around. I think he wanted to be rescued. I signaled for Owen to come and join us. He did.

“You have a very nice boy here,” I said. Owen gave me a look but didn’t comment on my comment.

“Yes, Ronald is a very good boy. He has a baseball game tomorrow. We would really appreciate it if you would come, you and Lana,” he said.

“Would it be all right if we came to your game tomorrow, Ronnie?” I said.

“Yes, sir,” he said.

“Well good, then we will try to make it,” I said.

The girls had been left inside to dawdle while I got introduced to their brother. Well, they were teenagers.

Abigail came up to me, us, Owen and me. Ronnie ran into the house. I wasn’t sure whether it was me he was running from or to something else.

“I’ll be talking to him,” said Abigail. She turned on her heels and went inside presumably to look for my boy. Well, not my boy anymore.

“You are a shock,” said Owen. “You should have been here these past years.” I gave him a look that bordered on pure hatred. But then again, did I really hate the man, or, was it just a serious case of out of control envy.