Chapter 1

“I’m NOT a little girl!” she yelled back at me. She was looking into the engine area with a questioning expression on her cute face.

“Sorry, uhh ... young lady. And, I didn’t say little girl, I said little lady. I didn’t mean to upset you, just seeing if you were OK. Could you come over here? Please? You have a problem there, young lady.” I tried to calm the situation as much as I could, being there was a small crisis brewing with her car. I saw something dripping, then there was a little blue flame.

“Not actually that, either,” she mumbled, but I caught it, not really understanding.

“Now, really quick, can you get back from there, before you get hurt?” I said, trying to get her back from the car without making her panic. Looking at me a little hesitantly, she moved back a little from the open hood of the engine compartment, and when she did, I grabbed her hand and pulled her away. I must’ve scared the hell out of her. She started swinging at me, but when the flash of heat caught us both on our sides, she calmed, then fainted.

Her car basically went up in a ball of fire, something I’ve never heard that particular brand of European luxury sport sedan to be known for. I did catch her on the way down, though, and carried her back to my truck, not 30 yards away. I had seen the dripping under the steering and firewall area as I was passing by her on the way back from the rest stop men’s room, having just relieved a little pressure from driving too far without a stop. She was parked on my way, and it was just blind luck that I saw it.

A little, very unladylike, grunt came from her cute little face as I laid her down on the tailgate. She was cute, I mean CUTE! Shoulder length light red hair, a little button nose, a few freckles, and gorgeous bright green eyes. A really attractive little girl. Reminded me of someone, but I couldn’t place it. She seemed about 5 feet tall, more than a full foot shorter than me, and could not have weighed a hundred pounds, or a little less than half of what I weigh now. Looks familiar. Who? Too bad I was so damned old. After what I’d been through, she could have been just what the doctor ordered.

One thing for sure was that she was going to need someone’s help for a bit, and I wanted to volunteer. Her car was a waste, and I don’t think anything in it could have survived.

She moved a little after the semi audible grunt, and I reached out to make sure she didn’t fall from the tailgate of the truck. “What happened? Why are you holding me?”

“Let’s start this way. My name is Charlie. Charlie Collins. And yours is?”

“Holly. Holly Fields.”

“THE? Holly Fields?” I exclaimed wondrously. I’m probably one of the few fans over the age of 25. I thought there was a resemblance, and that was the familiarity I sensed, but never even considered that it could be her.

“Yeah. That one.” Her tone sounded defeated, tired, dejected, and just down.

“What are you doing out here, on I-70, this late at night?” I asked. This would have to be good. Young, beautiful, popular entertainer, alone, in the middle of nowhere in the middle of the night.

“I just wanted to get away for a while. Losing my parents was bad enough, but my Aunt and Uncle and the managers ... The way they’re all acting and pushing ... It’s just too much and I need a break from it all.” She really sounded terrible. Not like the jubilant teen idol with the golden voice that I love to listen to constantly. My late wife chided me about it, but never put her foot down. It was the one offbeat habit I kept that she couldn’t break me of. She didn’t try too hard, though, leaving me one habit to keep me happy. Smoking, heavy drinking, and frequent sexual relations with her having gone by the wayside over the years.

“OK, now that we know who we are, I’ll mention what we have. You have a pile of ashes that is going to burn for about an hour. The fire department will be here shortly, and probably the police. I was able to call in the fire while you were out of it. Just barely had phone service, but it seemed to work enough to get the authorities involved. Is everything you have in the car?”

“Yep. Oh, wait.” She rolled her little butt and patted at her back pocket. She produced a driver’s license, a passport, and an American Express card from one of them. “Forgot to put them back in my purse after my last potty stop!” She smiled, just a little, but enough to make my heart stop for a second. She is just the cat’s meow. Still a little groggy, a couple tears started to stream down her cheeks. I reached out to just show a little support, but she wrapped her arms around my neck and hugged. “Thank you, Charlie. I have a feeling you just saved my life, and helped a few really nice people. And maybe upset and disappointed some others. Let me get my head straight and I’ll share a little and maybe explain.”

That comment set me back a bit, and I thought about my earlier thought about the fact that brand new little hundred thousand-dollar cars don’t just catch on fire like that. Sooooo, I figured from her rambling that the police were going to have a field day with this one. Gleaning evidence from burned out hulks wasn’t fun. But ... not my problem anymore. Gave it up for Lent then changed religions. Just a joke on that. I’m a retired cop. Not going to stick my nose in this one unless I must, in order to protect my crush. When she spoke, I got butterflies. I had no idea I could still feel like this around a girl.

The fire started burning down a little. We could still feel the warmth, but it was getting smaller. I had earlier asked Holly to hang on and moved the truck away, throwing a piece of 2x4 down where my back tire was, just so the cops would get an idea of where I was when it all happened.

Then I remembered her mumbling just before the skirmish, the soft explosion, her fainting, my carrying her cute little self to the truck ... I’m smitten, aren’t I?

“Holly, what did you mean when, earlier, you said ‘Not actually that, either’, when I called you little lady and then young lady?” I really wondered where her mind was now, because the look on her face was ... different. Scared? Apprehensive? Stunned? Kinda all those rolled in one. “Look Holly, I won’t judge. Never have, never will. You are a wonderful person. I’ve seen and read about all the things you do with kids in hospitals and such. Nothing you could tell me would make me think any less of you. Nothing.”

“Charlie, I don’t want to talk about me right now. I don’t know what’s happening, or going to happen, and I just can’t think right now. Suffice to say that you will be glad to be rid of me when this really sucky day, or night, I guess it is, comes to a glorious crashing halt.” She said it with finality, but yet, there was a bit of a quiver in her voice that told me she was a little unsure of herself at this point.

“OK, Holly. I’m not going to pester you, or try to pry, or insinuate myself into your affairs, but know this ... I care. I’ve been a fan of yours since you were 15 at that awards show when you gave your first big time performance. You were a doll. A beautiful girl. Still are. Hell, that was in what, two thousand nine, two thousand ten? Crap, Holly, You’re a twenty-two-year-old woman!!!”

She looked at me for a minute and floored me. “If that’s what you want to believe, just keep on with that. Whatever makes you happy. I owe you now, so that’s the least I can do.”

Another couple tears came down, so I reached out again, wrapped my arms around her and patted her back a little. She repeated the process, putting her arms around my neck and giving a light squeeze. Then the sirens came. Lots of them. The police cruiser, then the Highway Patrol with a big old community fire engine right behind. I picked her up gently and set her on the ground in her cute little sandals. There I go again. She has the prettiest legs, the cutest little feet, a pair of knees that defy looking away, and a cute little butt. Oh, that butt in those shorts. I am a really bad person. I know that, now. And lost.

The police called in a suit, so I felt better. They thought the fire might be a little hinky as well. Thankfully they understood I wasn’t part of the problem after questioning Holly. So, when they did talk to me, it wasn’t an interrogation, just questions, and I cooperated. Up to and including my employment, my past, and a few other questions. Uh Oh. Oh well, it would’ve come out sooner or later. Once Holly meandered over to where we were, and after making sure nothing of any value was to be had from her car, she heard me finish the “retired cop” and “anything I can do to help” lines. She looked questioningly at me, but didn’t say much.

“Ma’am, do you have arrangements made for the evening?” the highway patrolman asked her. “No, not yet. My phone, my everything, I guess, was in that car. I guess I...” I interrupted.

“Holly, I can take you to town and get you into a hotel or something until we can get you straightened out.” I had to volunteer myself. I had to. I was in severe crushtivity with this lady, and just couldn’t handle not knowing she was OK.

“Charlie, you don’t need to bother. You’ve done so much already.”

It sounded like a half-hearted protest, so I came back with... “Nope it’s fine. You know I care. You know I’d worry. It’s fine. I’d like to help. Really.”

“How about your...” I interrupted again.

“I don’t have anyone. I’m just on my way home. There is Critter, but he’s fine. Doesn’t seem to like me much anymore, anyway, and doesn’t mind when I’m gone.”

“Critter?” She giggled. I melted. AGAIN! I am toast. I would sign my orange yard tractor over to her if she asked. That is saying something. I love that tractor. It’s a diesel. Little, but ... Dang! Charlie is lost. “Cat. If you can call him that. Most of them are worth something, or do something. Critter? Nope.”

“OK,” she said to the state trooper, “I guess I’ll let this gentle knight once again save me and carry me off on his giant steed.” She was smiling now, and I couldn’t really figure out why, until I realized ... An attempt had been made on her life and they, whoever they were, were nowhere near here, nor did they know where she was, and she couldn’t be traced unless she used her credit card.

The suit, Detective Henderson of the local county Sheriff’s office, talked with us for a bit. “Miss Fields, you and this gentleman, Mr. Collins, Charlie, is it?” He looked at me and smirked, recognizing the name, but not letting on to her. “You need to remember, that the scrape marks we found on the sensors and those little gizmos the fire chief found on the fuel lines indicate someone, possibly, is trying to hurt you. After what you’ve told me about the last couple years, I’m not stating it as a fact, but I’d stay obscure for a while. We are not going to mention yours or Charlie’s name in the report yet, just in case someone comes a-lookin’. The only people that will know it was you involved are us here, and the DA. I’ll tell the Sheriff, as well, but he’ll be OK with it. He likes the cloak and dagger stuff and will be thrilled we were able to help a big star like you, Holly. Be safe. I have Charlie’s number and will call y’all in the morning.”

The flatbed wrecker showed up and dragged what was left of Holly’s car on board, and off to the cop shop as evidence. Someone had tried to murder one of the most popular country/pop singers of the age, and here she was sitting in my truck. I was still a few hours from home on the other side of Missouri, but I figured we could go to town where the Sheriff’s department was and find something there. Somewhere to stay, eat, let her recover. We were following the cruisers back to town when she broke the silence.

“You wanted to know what I meant earlier. It was Howard.” She huffed. “My name. I was born Howard Charles Fielding. You are now only the third living person to know that, besides some medical people, so be careful with the information.” Needless to say, after that being blurted out, I was stunned, flabbergasted, shocked, and well, I decided to tease her and act just a little bit miffed.

“I said I wouldn’t judge, but I was expecting you would proclaim to be an alcoholic, or a wanton slut, or a kleptomaniac, or something along those lines. I never expected that tonight I would find out I’ve been in love from afar with a little boy for seven years. Now what do I do??” I asked that with a bit of mirth, hoping to catch her off guard so that she wouldn’t clam up, withdraw, start crying, or whatever it is girls do when scared and confused. She acted a little dazed at my outburst. “Are you OK?” I asked, turning to her and smiling, hoping beyond hope she was. “We need to spend a couple days here in town getting your situation documented for the cops, then I’m going to ask you to let me take you to my place for a while. You’ll be safe there. It’s about four hours from here. I live about 10 miles outside of town. A bigger town than this, but not huge. You’ll have access to a phone, a car, and creature comforts, while you are out of sight from whoever it is that might want to hurt you.”

“You still want to help? Even knowing? No, Charlie, I’m not ‘OK’ (she made air quotes). I will be, but I’m not now. I need to take a risk with you, so I’m going to. Remind me to talk with you about it later. I think I know who’s trying to hurt me. Thankfully, they don’t know that much about me. Not as much as you know now, actually. Like I told the police, it’s probably my aunt and uncle. Dad’s step-brother from when Grans, my grandma on my dad’s side, remarried. Never cared much for her new husband or his son, Gary, but such is life. Now I think that he and his wife Susan are trying to get my ... my everything. I had a lot in Mom’s name, and some in Grans’, and now that they and Dad are gone, I need to fix all that. Gary and Susan are beneficiaries to a lot of my holdings, somehow. With a few charities aside, most of them. How stupid I am!!”

“Holly, what happened with your mom and dad? Was it an accident like the news said?” I really didn’t expect her answer, but then I don’t think she did either.

“I used to think so, until tonight.” She went quiet for a while, and I didn’t bother her after that. She clearly needed to think, and I clearly needed to pray that I could be gentleman enough to keep this beautiful little bird close to my nest. Shit I’m in trouble. I hope she doesn’t see through me. She’ll run for the woods.

Once in town, we stopped at the Quality Inn and went to the desk. An old man and a little girl with no luggage. She really does look like a teenager. “Sir, we aren’t that kind of establishment,” the older lady behind the counter said. She had quite a nasty smirk on her face.

“What kind would that be, Ma’am? The kind that provides a room for a young lady traveler who is needing a place to sleep before she spends the day telling the cops about how her car blew up and she doesn’t have anything for clothes, or a toothbrush, ‘cause they burned in the fire? Or the kind that provides a room for an old man so he can get some sleep before he drives home to his cat in the morning? Is that the kind of hotel you aren’t?” Holly could tell I was getting a little unhinged and stepped up.

“Ma’am, we want a room with two beds, a bathroom, and a TV. Do you by chance have one of those??” She seemed determined to make the clerk and her companion, namely ME, freak out a little. I was definitely expecting two rooms. “Charlie, we need for you to pay for this so my credit card doesn’t bleep off where I am, and I certainly don’t want Miss Nosy to know my name, so why don’t you use Mr. Smith and Ms. Jones on the registration for ONE room, and she can call the police to verify we’re not the bad guys. How does that sound?”

“Well, when you put it that way!” I exclaimed. The old lady capitulated and helped us. I shouldn’t call her that. Even though she in no way looked it, I’ll bet she was younger than me. Well, we finished checking in, then left for the Walmart across the street.

“I haven’t been in one of these since I was a kid, and they were a lot smaller back home then. This thing is huge,” Holly said as she looked around at the place. Open 24 hours, so we could stop over and grab her a few things to hold her over a bit. One thing she did was go straight for the girls’ section and grab a couple pairs of pink Hello Kitty underpants. Cute ones, then over to men’s for a couple of Extra Large Tall T-shirts to use as night gowns. This was going to be fun. In women’s she also picked up a couple bras, a pair of tennis shoes, some socks, some shorts, a skirt, and a couple cute blouses to wear with them. While I was holding the bras, I noticed they were a 32A+. Oh shit, here we go again. I’m not too old to feel the way I’m feeling inside, but I don’t know if it’s proper or not. Lost. Totally lost on this little girl. We picked her up some personal stuff at the pharmacy and healthcare area, toothbrush, hairbrush, and such, then headed back to the hotel.

The desk clerk looked up as we walked by, and I swear, if looks could kill, I’d at least have a broken arm.

Holly went into the bathroom with her things, and after the shower, then the faucet, ran a bit, she came out. Looking cute as ever, not a touch of makeup, hair a little damp. She wore the long T-shirt and since it was just a white one, I saw she had her new panties on under it. No evidence at all about what she mentioned earlier, though. Not a hint. She was all female from where I was looking. I thought about it for about three seconds, then asked Holly if I could brush her hair for her. She seemed a little shy about it, but came over and stood between my legs at the end of my bed and let me have my fun. And it was fun. Just brushing her hair made me feel pretty good, I have to admit. Longish, reddish, curlish, cutish. Yeah, it was fun. For a bit.

She started fidgeting and, I thought, made it clear she wanted me to finish, so I stopped and handed her the brush, grabbed my go bag and headed for the bathroom myself. She noticed I didn’t quite want to quit brushing yet, evidently picking up on my attitude when I went to the bathroom, because when I got out she said, “Charlie, I’m sorry I stopped you, but it felt so good with you doing it, and ... well ... it just seemed like maybe I shouldn’t have you doing it. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you mad at me.” She sounded very genuine and apologetic.

“Look, Holly. I don’t want to upset you. I don’t want to bother you. I want to do nothing that makes you uncomfortable in any way. I just want to help you get through whatever it is you’re going through as unscathed as possible. I was serious when I said I cared. I really think you are a wonderful person. A great role model. You’re beautiful. Your music speaks to me. It has since you started out back in twenty ten, or whenever. My wife used to tease me about you all the time, asking when I was going to leave her for you. I’d joke back and tell her ‘right after she calls me!’ and we’d get a chuckle out of it.” I noticed then that her face sort of screwed up a little when I mentioned my wife.

“Charlie, I thought you didn’t have a family to go back to,” she questioned me, a little quietly, not wanting to cause any issues, I presumed.

“No, Holly, I don’t. She’s been gone a while now. Not something I talk about much.” I didn’t want to discuss it now, due to Holly’s circumstances, but I probably would explain it a little later if she was still around and wanted to know. It was a pretty horrible time for me and it’s just something I didn’t dwell on often. She wasn’t just gone, as in she left. She was taken. THEY were taken, and there was a lot more to the story to tell. Just not now. Holly didn’t need that kind of information now. Not now, at all.

“OK, but if you want to talk, I could listen,” Holly told me. I’m sure she was thinking she could help, but I’ve been through a lot since then, therapy, both professional and revengeful, and I was back in a fairly good place. Planning on staying there, as well.

“What I really want is to brush your hair a little more, then we need to get some sleep. Would that be OK with you, Missy?” I asked her with a big smile, hoping that would let her know I wasn’t being condescending, but caring.

She came over and backed into my legs again, this time pushing back so her tush was up against me. I scooted back a little to give her more room so she could sit on the edge of the bed between my legs. “Yeah, so get to it, old man. I’m tired, too.” She giggled a little. I brushed a few strokes. “Charlie, what am I going to do now?” Her voice got a little shaky.

“Well, Holly. Notice that I used your name and not Missy, Little Girl, or Little anything for that matter, because I know you’re trying to be serious now. We are going to talk to the police in the morning. They will conduct an investigation. I’m sure the FBI will be involved, since you went over a few state lines with those devices and damage on your car. If there are problems, you’ll need help. I’d like to offer that. I’m in a position right now to do that, and can’t think of anything I’d enjoy more. If you’ll let me, that is.” I was hoping not to scare her off by sounding like a stalker or a perv or something, but here I was, perving out on her hair. Just brushing her hair was making my chest tighten with those butterflies I hadn’t felt since I was a youngster.

She pondered that for a minute, then started speaking softly, “You have been nothing if not a gentleman, even though I don’t know why. Especially now. You probably don’t know exactly how to react to finding that your little star crush is not what you thought she was. Now, I don’t want you to think badly of me, but I’ve been with people before. I mean been with people in a relationship way. After all, I am twenty-two now. Only one of those knows of my status as a transgirl. She won’t say anything to anyone. The others, a couple of guys, never got past second base, ‘cause I’m a little picky about boyfriends. I don’t care much for assholes, and most men seem to be in that category. Anyway, I can’t go home right now, and I do need help, you’re right about that, so I’m going to cave to your demands to be my knight in shining armor. I also still need time to unwind and face what’s happened recently. Since you say you have the time and want to help, maybe you can help me relax and sort it all out. So, you good with all that?” She was smiling again. I could her in the mirror on the wall over the desk.

“Yes, Holly. Whatever you need. I’m game. I have to be the luckiest guy in the world to have stumbled upon this mess. And by the way, I’ve been begging, not demanding. You do know the difference, yes?” She snickered at that. Then I asked, “Why did you mention relationships and the people just now?” I was curious. A girl and two guys, but she was obviously closer to the girl.

“I just wanted you to understand that I’m not a little girl. I’m a woman. I wasn’t born one, but since my parents were understanding enough to let me grow up as a girl, then help with the hormones, then the operation and such, when I was young enough for it to do some good, I’ve had it pretty easy. The girl I mentioned was in the same boat, but not as fortunate. It could be called a very strange lesbian relationship, since we were both transgirls. When she found out that I was also seeing one of the guys, she flipped. I hope she’s OK. She had other serious issues as well, but she didn’t believe me that I cared more about her than them. I had to at least show I was interested in guys to keep up appearances for marketing. I hated that part of it. I actually liked one of them, as a friend, but he got too pushy and demanding and ruined that for both of us. Anyway, I just wanted to share a little. I actually like you, and feel attracted to you, more than a little. I hate to be so forward, Charlie, but you are cute, in a hunky handsome guy sort of way, and you have been nice to me, and nothing but a gentleman. Girls like that in a guy.”

“Thank you, Holly. You just made my evening. Maybe my week, month, year, whatever. Can I ask a couple personal questions that are absolutely none of my business?”

“Sure, but before you begin, my boobs are small, but natural. I have a little tiny peepee that doesn’t work all that well, but well enough for me, and I don’t have any nuts, balls, testicles, or whatever you want to call them.” She rolled that out pretty quickly and left me with nothing.

“So much for my questions at this point. How’s your hair feeling? Well, how’s your head feeling? I know hair doesn’t actually feel. Unless you have a hangover,” I joked. She laughed.

“Absolutely wonderful. Thank you. No one has done that since Mom, and that was quite a while ago.” She got a frown on her face that just about killed me. She was recalling better times. Then cracked a little smile. “I’m not sure why, but for some reason, having someone else brush your hair, or shampoo it for that matter, just feels really, really good. It’s kind of like, excuse me for this, mas ... masturbating. It feels so much better when someone else does it. That’s so embarrassing. Sorry, Charlie, that was a little forward. I shouldn’t have said that.”

“Not at all, sweetheart. Don’t worry. I know what you mean, and we’re all adults here,” I said as I was trying unsuccessfully to block that thought from my dirty little mind. Remaining gentlemanly was going to take some doing. “Let’s get some shut eye. That detective will be calling in the morning. Remind me to stop by the desk on the way out to make sure they have us here for two nights, at least, OK, Holly?” I asked, as I was climbing under the covers.

She said, “I’ll try, but I don’t have the best memory for things like that. Thanks for asking me to help, though,” she giggled again, my chest fluttered. I am so totally toast. Her just giggling, or smiling, was enough to set off feelings I don’t think I have ever actually had for any other woman, up to and including my previous and late wives.

I watched her bend over to pull her blankets aside then crawl into her bed. SHIT!! Her legs were to die for and her little butt was so cute. Hello, Kitty!!! She laid on the pillow, bid me goodnight, and that’s the last word I heard from her. Note I said word. I reached over, turning off the lamp and just looked at her while she snored softly. So darling. So cute. So vulnerable. How in the heck does a twenty-two-year-old woman look like such a little girl? Amazing, and so attractive. I realized then that while I don’t have a penchant for teenaged girls, I certainly did for this one, even though she wasn’t really that young. She sure looked it. I pondered that thought for about seven seconds, and the next thing I knew, my cell phone was going off. Not the alarm, I forgot to set it, but the phone.

“Hello, Charlie here,” I answered in my normal way, but with a bit of a drowsy voice. I hated doing that. Made me sound, I don’t know, less than par?

“Good morning, Charlie. Detective Henderson, Sheriff’s Department. Can you and Holly come in to the Sheriff’s office this morning around ten o’clock?” The detective sounded way too awake for being this early in the morning.

“Sure, what time is it now?” I asked, looking at my phone after asking, and saw it was eight already.

“A little after eight. Will that be OK?” I must’ve sounded a little irked, so he was going to give us a little time, I think.

“How ‘bout ten-thirty, so I can stop Holly and I off for a little something to eat on the way.” I hoped he wouldn’t mind too much, but I hate rushing around. Hate it.

“Yeah, that’s fine. Go ahead and make it eleven. We have plenty to do to get ready, and the FBI agent from Kansas City will be here around that time as well.” He sounded fine with it, so I was, too. “OK, thanks, see you then,” I said. I looked over at Holly, and saw the prettiest green eyes looking back at me. Damn that little girl is beautiful.

“Good morning, gorgeous. How’d you sleep?” I asked, really hoping she’d slept well with all this going on around her.

“Gorgeous, huh? Where’d that come from? You talk to all the women you meet like that?” she inquired.

“No, just the ones I sleep with and that have beautiful green eyes and Hello Kitty panties!” I answered.

She shrieked, “WHAT?!”

I went on, “You bent over last night to crawl into bed and I saw the cutest little panties. Reminded me of what a seventh grader might wear at a sleepover. And you do wear them well, I must admit, with appropriate apology if I offend by saying so.”

“In the first place, you did not sleep with me, but thank you for the comment on my eyes. My mom always said they were my prettiest asset. And how would you know about 7th grade girls?”

Hopefully this will go over OK. I started out with, “Any time I can hear a girl snore in my room, I’m sleeping with her. Your eyes are ‘may be’ your best asset, but your asset and your voice are right behind,” then I ended with, “and I had one once. A daughter. I know a little about them. They act like little girls at that age, then they change into ... Not little girls.”

“You’ll need to finish that story, I’m sure. My asset, huh? Charlie, are you a pervert?”

She smiled, to let me know she was just jerking my chain, but I probably caught her off guard with, “I wasn’t until last night. I’ve never considered teenage girls as a ‘thing’ before, and I realize you aren’t, but you look like you are, most of the time. I’m sorry, Holly, but I’m very much enchanted by you. I hope that doesn’t cause a problem.” I felt my happiness slipping away for a bit, not wanting to lose what I don’t have anyway, but I didn’t know how to feel.