Jokes and Giggles - Cover

Jokes and Giggles

Copyright© 2015 by Jack Spratt

Chapter 915

A cannibal was walking through the jungle And came upon a restaurant operated by a Fellow cannibal.

Feeling somewhat hungry, he sat down and looked over the menu...

+Tourist: $5.00

+Broiled Missionary: $10.00

+Fried Explorer: $15.00

+Baked Democrat or Grilled Republican: $100.00

The cannibal called the waiter over and asked, “Why such a high price for the Politicians?”

The cook replied, “Have you ever tried to clean one? They’re so full of shit, it takes all morning...”


This group is compliments of dorsetmike

Who hails from across the pond...

Some of the words and places are British English, don’t know how well they seem on your side of the pond, ) Memories of a drunken party; nonsense rhymes:

Shtarkle shtarkle little twink who the hell you are you think up above the world sho high like a diamond in a goosegog pie


Thirty days hath Septober, April, June and Nowonder All the rest have eggs for breakfast Except Grandma, and she rides a bike


First verse of one of “those” songs - can’t remember more; My sister is a whore in Picadilly My mother is another in the Strand While me father flogs his asshole round the Elephant and Castle We’re the finest fuckin’ family in the land!


Some limericks There once was a girl from the Cape who had an affair with an ape the result was most horrid all bum and no forehead with one hailess ball, like a grape.


There once was a bishop of Buckingham stood on a bridge down at Uppingham he was thrilled by the stunts of the cunts in the punts and the tricks of the dicks that were fucking ‘em


Finally, overheard in the mens room; No matter how hard you shake your peg The last 3 drops run down your leg

(This one probably dates from the 17th C as pego or peg was a slang term for penis)

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