Chapter 154

A man met a beautiful lady and he decided he wanted to marry her right away.

She said, "But we don't know anything about each other."

He said, "That's all right, we'll learn about each other as we go along." So she consented, and they were married, and went on a honeymoon to a very nice resort.

So one morning they were lying by the pool, when he got up off of his towel, climbed up to the 10 Meter board and did a two and a half tuck reverse piked with a double twist. This was followed by a three rotations in jackknife position, where he straightened out and cut the water like a knife.

After a few more demonstrations, he came back and lay down on the towel.

She said, "That was incredible!"

He said, "I used to be an Olympic diving champion. You see, I told you we'd learn more about ourselves as we went along."

So she got up, jumped in the pool, and started doing laps. After about thirty laps she climbed back out and lay down on her towel hardly out of breath.

He said, "That was incredible! Were you an Olympic endurance swimmer?"

"No." she said, "I was a hooker in Venice and I worked both sides of the canal."

Hi there!

"I know everybody prefers Home Hardware better, BUT! you will have to admit that this one great commercial!"

THIS MAY BE ONE OF THE GREATEST COMMERCIALS OF ALL TIME https://www.youtube.com/embed/uk2a-MJyM1g

Gotta love European commercials!

Right over the border of Northern Germany in Denmark there are a couple of "Fleggard" Supermarkets (part of the Costco family) where you can find everything your heart craves, especially high tech and household appliances; a lot cheaper than in Germany.

For this commercial, more than 100 skydiver women jumped from a transport plane, you see them in free fall forming the ad text"SIEMENS washing machine for only 269 Euros".

Let it load before you start to view ... it takes a while!!! https://player.vimeo.com/video/57468088?title=0&byline=0&portrait=0&color=d30000&api=1&player_id=media-player

How does he do it? Click on the link. http://www.chonday.com/Videos/maijicghju3

This one is compliments of Bob

This is something to think about when negative people are doing their best to rain on your parade...

So remember this story the next time...

A woman was at her hairdresser's getting her hair styled for a trip to Rome with her husband...

She mentioned the trip to the hairdresser, who responded: " Rome? Why would anyone want to go there? It's crowded and dirty. You're crazy to go to Rome. So, how are you getting there?"

"We're taking Continental," was the reply. "We got a great rate!"

"Continental?" exclaimed the hairdresser.

"That's a terrible airline. Their planes are old, their flight attendants are ugly, and they're always late. So, where are you staying in Rome?"

"We'll be at this exclusive little place over on Rome's Tiber River called Teste."

"Don't go any further. I know that place.

Everybody thinks it's going to be something special and exclusive, but it's really a dump."

"We're going to go to see the Vatican and maybe get to see the Pope."

"That's rich," laughed the hairdresser. "You and a million other people trying to see him. He'll look the size of an ant. Boy, good luck on this lousy trip of yours. You're going to need it."

A month later, the woman again came in for a hairdo. The hairdresser asked her about her trip to Rome.

"It was wonderful," explained the woman,

"not only were we on time in one of Continental's brand new planes, but it was overbooked, and they bumped us up to first class. The food and wine were wonderful, and I had a handsome 28-year-old steward who waited on me hand and foot ... And the hotel was great! They'd just finished a $5 million remodeling job, and now it's a jewel, the finest hotel in the city. They, too, were overbooked, so they apologized and gave us their owner's suite at no extra charge!"

"Well," muttered the hairdresser, "that's all well and good, but I know you didn't get to see the Pope."

"Actually, we were quite lucky, because as we toured the Vatican, a Swiss Guard tapped me on the shoulder, and explained that the Pope likes to meet some of the visitors, and if I'd be so kind as to step into his private room and wait, the

Pope would personally greet me. Sure enough, five minutes later, the Pope walked through the door and shook my hand! I knelt down and he spoke a few words to me..."

"Oh, really! What'd he say?"

He said: "Who fucked up your hair?"