Jokes and Giggles
Chapter 57

Copyright© 2015 by Jack Spratt

An Engineer Could Not Find A Job, So He Opens A Clinic, And Puts A Sign Outside That Says Get Treatment For $50, If Not Cured Get Back $100.

A Doctor Thinks This Is A Good Opportunity Show Up The Engineer And Earn A Quick $100. And So He Visits The Clinic.

Doctor: I Have Lost My Sense Of Taste.

Engineer: Nurse, Bring The Medicine From Box No 22 And Place 3 Drops In The Patient's Mouth.

Patient (Doctor): Spits Out The Medicine And Says "This Is Not Medicine, It's Gasoline".

Engineer: Congrats ... You Have Your Taste Back ... That Will Be $50

Doctor Gets Annoyed, And Returns After Several Days To Recover His Money.

Doctor : I Have Lost My Memory And Can't Remember A Thing.

Engineer : Nurse, Bring Medicine From Box No 22 And Put 3 Drops In Patient's Mouth.

Doctor: "This Medicine Is For The Sense Of Taste" Protests The Doctor.

Engineer : Congrats. Your Memory Is Back ... That Will Be $50

Doctor Leaves, But After Several Days Angrily Returns For One Last Try.

Doctor : My Eyesight Has Become Weak.

Engineer : Well I Don't Have Any Medicine For That. Take This $100

Doctor : But This Is $50 Note

Engineer : Congratulations, Your Eyesight Has Gotten Better ... That Will Be $50


This one is Compliments of Larry

Montana Grizzly Bear Notice:

In light of the rising frequency of human/grizzly bear conflicts, the Montana Department of Fish and Game is advising hikers, hunters, and fishermen to take extra precautions and keep alert for bears while in the field.

We advise that outdoorsmen wear noisy little bells on their clothing so as not to startle the bears that aren't expecting them. We also advise outdoorsmen to carry pepper spray with them in case of an encounter with a bear.

It is also a good idea to watch out for fresh signs of bear activity. Outdoorsmen should recognize the difference between black bear and grizzly bear poop. Black bear poop is smaller and contains a lot of berry seeds and squirrel fur.

Grizzly bear poop has little bells in it and smells like pepper spray.

 
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