Chapter 11: Sauna Stories and Concert Tours

Edie Gerst and her editor published the story about my baby, Summer, George, Crystal, and me on Thursday. They carefully picked the day of the week, because that's the day most of the tabloids get to the newsstands, so it would be a week before they would be able to catch up with the scoop we'd given the Dayton Daily News. By the time they would be able to write about the story, it would be old news, and depending on what else happened during the week, including what flying saucers landed where and who the aliens abducted, we might not even be on the cover. One could only hope.

Edie's articles and four photographs of us were syndicated and showed up in other daily newspapers on Friday morning – at least, those that were fast enough to pick up the story off the wire. ET, and Access Hollywood picked up the story but made surprisingly light of the news, giving the story only a minute or two on each of their broadcasts; none of them sensationalized it. Their reports were just a happy recognition of a singer-star's baby and the hope that another was on the way. If you hadn't listened carefully, you would have missed that the mother was someone else's wife.

People magazine did get in touch through Terry and asked to do a feature spread on me, the baby, the mother, and the unique and loving arrangement that we had between us. They promised a favorable treatment. Previously, they had done right by us, so I trusted them. Terry set up the interview in Nashville for a few days after we returned and before Crystal and I started a concert tour of a dozen cities.

After Edie's article got published, and we saw how the news sat with the public, we all breathed easier. Crystal, Edie, and I stayed three more days at the Ellis's cottage in Michigan, and then we followed each other south to Greenville. Crystal rode with the Ellises so she could play with Summer and my baby in the backseat of their car. I rode the Harley. Edie drove behind me in her car.

To our surprise, the paparazzi had vanished from Greenville; they'd been scooped, and the vultures headed off to some other potential scandal. We stayed overnight at the Ellis's, said goodbye the next morning, and then I followed Edie and Crystal on my motorcycle all the way to Nashville. We'd invited Edie to be our guest, to be present at the People interview if their reporters didn't mind, and to join us for the first concert of our tour. Edie was so excited she could hardly contain herself. She kept jumping up and down at the prospects we'd offered her.

Nadia greeted us at the Nashville house with hugs and kisses much to the surprise of Edie who also got included. Nadia could be very inclusive and demonstrative. Ellen and Clair had gone into Nashville for a few nights at Ellen's condominium and to hang around with Terry and Dan, our agent and publicist, respectively, so the four of us had the house to ourselves.

I went for a run to iron out the kinks from riding the motorcycle for seven hours. When I got back Nadia had organized a fabulous dinner for us, so I showered quickly and joined the women on the patio outside the kitchen. At our insistence, Nadia joined us for the cocktail hour; however, she kept racing back and forth to the kitchen to tend to her feast. She told us what she'd heard in the grapevine about my fatherhood (my reputation hadn't suffered, and probably improved because of the inferred stability of a caring father), and we got Nadia talking about her classes.

As Nadia moved around the house, I evaluated her again. She still had the sexiest ass I'd ever seen on a woman, plus that cute Russian accent and vocabulary that often created a sentence structure so funny we had to laugh aloud – a point that never seemed to bother her; she learned from her mistakes. Nadia appeared more grown up than when Ellen and I had left alone to go to the west coast to make a movie – more mature, open, empathetic.

After dinner, the four of us went to the sauna. Nadia had quickly caught on that we had an intimate relationship with Edie, and she told me she wanted to be counted in on whatever happened. In an aside moment, she said to me in a whisper, "I like Miss Edie. Do you think she will let me play with her tonight – to lick her? Can we all play together? I am again tired of my battery toy; I need you – at least, a time with you so to make me feel right again." She gave me her goofy grin, which clearly meant she wanted me to fuck her brains out. The idea appealed to me too.

We sat in the sauna and enjoyed each other's nudity. Crystal got each of us talking about the sexiest or most unusual times we'd had sex. We were each to tell a story to titillate the others according to Crystal's rules. This would be a form of foreplay for us. We were supposed to be explicit and salacious in our descriptions, according to Crystal.

After great teasing, I had to go first and Crystal restricted me to talking about something that had happened on my road trip, although she had heard most of the stories. I told the three women about my stay in Arkansas during my road trip. I'd been arrested in Louisiana for felony robbery on a case of mistaken identity, and easily proved my innocence after a night in jail. I spotted my twin riding a nearly identical motorcycle in the small town of El Dorado, Arkansas. I hung out in a diner across the street from where I saw the bike to keep an eye on my nemesis – the guy I thought might have done the robberies I had gotten arrested for. Later, he was indeed caught red handed with my help.

The waitress and owner of the diner was a pretty woman named Pat. She and I hit it off, and the next you knew I'd taken a job there as a cook, dishwasher, and counterman to help out for a week. Well, one thing led to another, and one night we made love in every booth, on every table, and all along the various counters in the place. We were insatiable sex maniacs for the week I spent there. I described several of our sexual forays in stroke-by-stroke details much to the delight of my sauna mates.

Crystal went next. George Rinard, her co-star in the movie she'd just completed in Europe took her to a gala at the Louvre one evening. They and several hundred others enjoyed a cocktail hour, a sit down dinner, and private tours. She told us, "I challenged George to find a place where he could make love to me – he could be such a stick at times. He was suitably shocked, but then started to look for places as we walked along."

She continued after wiping a bead of perspiration from her face, "We lagged behind our small tour group to look at some tapestries from around the year 800. A small nook in the wall behind one tapestry that hung to the floor afforded us a hiding place. As our tour disappeared, George knelt, pulled down my panties, and ate me for five minutes as I groaned in pleasure. After than, we changed places, and I gave him the blow job of all blow jobs; and after that, I pulled my evening gown up to my waist, dropped the top of my strapless dress, and lay down on a hidden display case that seemed to be just the right height. George fucked me until we both came."

Crystal giggled a little, "As we straightened ourselves to be presentable again, and I might mention I had his juices running down my legs under my floor length gown, I noticed that we'd screwed atop a display case containing the oldest Persian carpet ever discovered – something from the fifth century, B.C. It had been removed from the grave of a Scythian prince – whatever that meant. It was beautiful and so old, and so worthy of our fucking on top of it."

We all laughed and turned to Nadia. She began, "When I turn eighteen, I go to Leningrad or now St. Petersburg; my father he have business there, and it is February and very cold, but not to bother, we used to that where we live so dress appropriately. I walk around and take tours while papa does his business over several days, and I meet a nice soldier on leave. He from Ukraine. First day, we kiss a lot; second day, I decide I want to make lovely with handsome guy."

We were all hanging on every word, delighting in her small slips of grammar. She went on, "We can find nowhere inside suitable to fuck, so we decide to do it outside, but the temperature is minus fifteen degrees celsius – that near zero the way you measure. This plus wind blowing. We walk and find cozy place under a bridge near the Winter Palace. We both strip off our clothing except boots until nearly naked, and then we happily fuck. We both turn blue too, really bright blue – and we worry about frost bite of vital parts. We laughing a lot too. We dress really fast, and run to a pub to get warm, and it takes us over an hour to stop shaking from the cold. People in restaurant surely knew what we had been doing because we are both so blue – even my breasts had turned blue when I look at them in lavatory trying to get warm. Nipples stay erect rest of day."

After suitable appreciation for the coldest fuck any of us had experienced by far, we looked at Edie. The sudden focus by the three of us on her made her blush, a reaction hard to see given the rosy state the sauna had created on our bodies – the opposite of Nadia's coldest fuck story.

Edie hesitated. She started in a low tone so we had to lean forward to hear her. "I did some crazy things in college, not always intentionally. And, I need to tell you that I wasn't completely candid with you in Michigan about having had a sexual experience with more than one person at a time." She gave us all an embarrassed little grin. "I had one other experience – once."

We nodded in unison for her to continue. "I was a junior and majoring in communications. People in that major also had many friends in the drama and theater group, especially those that put on plays at the campus theater. Anyway, there were these two guys that I really liked, but I started to date one of them – Steve. We were wild in bed, just like all of you." She gave us a lascivious smile.

"One time while we were fucking, Steve got me talking about whom else I liked, so I confessed to liking a friend we all called Tink. As we went along Steve laid out this whole threesome scenario with the two of us and Tink; I got so hot that I couldn't stand it. Anyway, he got me to agree to a threesome and by that time I would have taken on the entire football team."

Crystal smirked and said, "That's not so unusual, is it?"

Edie ignored Crystal's taunt and said, "Oh, I forgot to tell you, I also shared a fantasy with Steve about screwing somewhere where we might get caught or seen. I guess I'm a bit of an exhibitionist as well as a voyeur." She paused and regained her train of thought, "So, Steve talks to Tink who jumps at the opportunity to jump my bones. Moreover, the three of us agree to do it on the stage of the campus theater some night when nothing is going on and we have the place to ourselves."

"So, one night, we sneak into the theater, turn on one or two dim lights so we can see what we're doing, push a sofa used in some play into the middle of the stage, strip all our clothes off, and I start by sitting between the two guys as they kiss and paw all over me. As they do that to me, I'm massaging their important parts. My temperature rises past boiling. After a few minutes, I take turns giving them blow jobs, and next, one of them eats me out while I suck on the other. We trade back and forth several times."

Edie paused to make sure everyone was listening, "So, one guy starts fucking me and I suck the other, and the guys take turns flipping me back and forth, much to my delight. We try several positions, all on the couch in the middle of the stage. After a while, Steve asks whether I want to be double penetrated. I think about this because I'd never had anal sex up to that point, but I agree if he can find some lube. He must have planned ahead, because he produced a tube of stuff."

"Steve greased me up as well as his cock, and I bend over, he slowly works himself into me, and I kind of enjoy it – it's different and dirty and sexy, anyway. After a few minutes, he pulls me up and into his lap, and Tink comes and sinks himself into my vagina. So, I'm fucking two guys at once, and I start throwing off one orgasm after another with little screams, and Steve says to Tink and me, 'I'm about to cum – really hard – this is the fucking best sex I've ever had.' Tink agreed, and announced he was about to cum. Meanwhile, I was about to cum again, and about a minute or two later, all three of us start moaning and when I'm not cuming I'm screaming things like 'Oh, fuck, this is great, ' or whatever."

She paused for dramatic effect. "We all came, and now I am dripping junk out of both holes and in a very awkward position because the guys stayed embedded in me after they came; I mean we were comfortable and happy. And, picture this, from the shadows of the audience about two-dozen people start applauding and cheering our performance. I about melted into the floor I was so embarrassed. The three of us grabbed out clothes and tore off stage, but the applause kept going and shouts of 'Encore, ' and 'More, more.'"

Crystal is laughing along with the rest of us, "So what did you do?"

Edie got a big smile, "Why, we went back out on the stage in a line, and bowed deeply to the audience, only then I can see it's more like thirty people. We're still nude, and I obviously have cum running down my legs from both holes." She sighed, "We went off stage, dressed, I tried to clean up in one of the dressing rooms, and then we snuck out the back door. It turned out that the whole cast and crew of some campus play had turned up for a late evening rehearsal. I was mortified."

I said, "I feel the experience I shared was too tame by your standards. Tomorrow, if we do a sauna, I'll tell you about Oklahoma, or maybe a little adventure Crystal and I had in Illinois."

We exited the sauna, and I turned off the power to the small room. We hit the showers, and then we hit the bed. Edie captured the spirit of the night an hour later when she said, "I never thought a guy could successfully make love to three women at the same time – my God, I was soooooo wrong."

The interview with People magazine took place two days later. They had requested that the interview be done at Crystal's home, so we worked out of the home's music studio rehearsing for our upcoming concerts until just after lunch when the two reporters – Jan and Kyle, and a photographer – Ralph – showed up. They were a friendly lot, and even brought some fresh flowers to Crystal to say thank you for her hospitality.

Crystal and I sat with the reporters, and Edie came into the room carrying her iPad. I did introductions, asked whether she could sit in while they interview us, and the People team looked a little puzzled until I explained that Edie had discovered the hidden baby and deduced the circumstances of Little Jim's birth.

Edie jumped in, "I also have a big bargaining chip, if you'll let me stay. I just want to hear how you guys interview and maybe learn something from the pros. I have no ulterior motive, unless Jim or Crystal says something I haven't heard about the baby. I think we hashed it all out pretty well though."

Kyle asked with a smile, "What's your bargaining chip?"

Edie pulled her iPad from behind her back, "I have about two hundred pictures of Little Jim, Jim, Crystal, and the baby's parents. I'm willing to share." She grinned; she knew she had a very valuable bargaining chip.

Jan and Kyle flopped back against the sofa cushions as though someone pushed them. Jan said, "You're kidding, right?" Ralph had taken three large steps from where he stood to join our conversational circle. He looked pleasantly surprised.

I shook my head to affirm what Edie had said. Crystal and I had already screened the pictures up in Greenville with George and Summer. They all had the Good Housekeeping seal of approval from us.

Edie said, "Nope. Is that a good chip to play?"

Jan said, "You bet; one of the best. You might just save us a trip to Ohio too, can we see them?"

Edie passed her the iPad, and Jan, Kyle, and Ralph hunkered over the screen as Jan flipped through every picture with one finger. Halfway through, Ralph said, "These are fabulous. You're composition is great, and you took care to have good lighting. They don't look like snapshots; they look really professional. Did you take them?"

Edie looked especially proud, "Yes. I have a Canon Rebel with a quality strobe, that's all."

After every shot had been scanned, Ralph said, "Edie, you weren't in any of these. Can we get a picture of you with Jim and Crystal?" We agreed, so Ralph posed us in front of the majestic mantel and fireplace in our living room, and took six shots.

Jan started the interview talking to Edie, and Ralph took a couple of shots just of her. "How did you find Jim's baby?"

Edie told her story about doing her family's genealogy, going to the Darke County Courthouse and happening to see my name being used for a new baby. The birth date was close to one of her new cousins, so she made note of it. A few days later, and some research in the newspapers morgue, and she figured out to the day that I'd been in Greenville exactly nine months before the baby was born. She'd made the leap to my being the father, wrangled a press pass at one of our press conferences, posed her question, and then all hell broke loose for a week in the press until she filed the confirming story.

Jan studied Edie for a second and asked, "Why did you spin the story the way you did? I mean, you could have sensationalized it and kept all the hooprah about the baby going for a few more weeks, particularly since I gather from your article that Summer Ellis is pregnant by Jim again."

Edie responded, "In the course of talking to Jim, Crystal, and the Ellises, I realized I'd met some of the nicest people you'd ever hope to meet in the world. Jim's baby wasn't conceived at some swinger's orgy or as an accident in an extramarital affair. Little Jim is truly a love child surrounded by four loving adults who knew exactly what they were doing to help one another. The only emotion I have ever found surrounding this child – and the next one – is love."

Jan and Kyle had both sat spellbound as Edie talked.

Kyle turned to me, "You mean George isn't the least bit pissed off that you messed around with his wife?"

I shook my head, "Not one bit. I would have cut off my arm for him if he'd asked for that; instead, he wanted me to love his wife and conceive the child that he couldn't because of a wartime injury. I love both George and Summer. I would still do anything I could to help them."

Kyle turned to Crystal, "And you weren't angry or peeved that your boyfriend and lover not only slept with Summer, but also got her pregnant ... and, I guess, he did it again last week?"

Crystal actually laughed, "Not at all, and I'm not lying to you. When Jim told me what had transpired in Ohio, I kept my fingers crossed that the pregnancy had taken. I even prodded Jim to be sure he'd treated Summer with love and kindness, although I would have expected nothing less. Summer said she knew the instant her egg got fertilized, but I needed to hear some confirmation – that came a few weeks later when George called Jim with the good news. Anyway, it did work, and I felt so happy and grateful for Jim, for the Ellises, and for the child that's now Little Jim."

Jan turned to me, "Are you going to be an 'involved parent'?"

"

I thought for a moment before responding because I wanted to get the words right. "I am not going to try to play Daddy; that's George's job and that's the role he has wanted to play for years with these children that they've tried to conceive. That said, I'm not going to be distant from him either. I'll probably have a relationship with Little Jim and the new child something like an out of town Uncle might have. I'll be overly generous at Christmas, on birthdays, and on other special occasions, if it's approved by George and Summer. They are his parents, not me – or Crystal."

"Do you love the baby?"

"Every bone in my body aches for that child's health and happiness in life – the same for the new one too. My late wife and I wanted children, and we were just shifting to a 'Let's get pregnant and have a family mode' when Karen got ill – that was my wife up until she died about two-and-a-half years ago. So, I've been ready to be a Daddy for a long time – or a great Uncle."

Jan turned to Crystal, "Might you have a child by Jim?"

Crystal said in a thoughtful mood, "I wouldn't rule it out, but it's not in any planning that we've done. I hate to say it, but the demands of this career, particularly my fortunate status in music and now the movie industry, just may not allow me to be attentive to any signals I may get or desire I have. For now, I've turned that switch off."

Crystal held her hand up to indicate she had more to say. "When we were with the Ellises, they asked me whether I would join Jim in his 'godfather' role, and become the baby's godmother." She got a tear in her eyes and a little choked up; "That's the nicest request I think anybody's ever made of me. I said, 'You bet.' I am very proud of that label, and I intend to honor and earn it every chance I get."

Kyle said, "So you plan to see the Ellises again? How often?"

Crystal said, "We didn't set a schedule, but I want to blend in with their family in helping to care for James and the question mark. I do remember how to babysit and change diapers and all that." She chuckled. "I expect at some key holidays, as Jim said, we'll find a way to get together with them, maybe even give the Ellises a chance to get away for a long weekend alone."

Jan said, "Errr ... uhmmm ... Jim, would you ... will you continue your ... ah ... liaison with Summer?" I had to piece that sentence together to figure out that she wanted to know whether I'd be sleeping with Summer again.

I just shrugged my shoulders; that seemed to be the best answer – a maybe yes and maybe no.

The rest of the interview talked about how I'd kept up-to-date on Summer's pregnancy, what I planned to do for the new one, what it felt like to hold my child for the first time (astounding and it made me tearful), why I'd had such a large gap in my visits (I'd been making a movie in Central America), how often we'd kept in touch with the Ellises (weekly), and on and on. The reporters were very thorough.

Nadia came swishing into the living room with a large tray with teas, coffee, and freshly baked cookies on it. She gave me a wink as she left the room when no one else could see her.

Crystal gave Ralph a tour of the house. I took Jan and Kyle down to the music studio, and even played some of our new songs for them – stuff that no one else had heard yet. Ralph and Crystal eventually showed up and took some more photos, including some of us singing at the studio's microphones.

As the trio prepared to leave, Jan asked Edie about the photographs. Edie had disappeared during the tour, but with obvious pride of authorship, she handed over a compact disk with all 200 pictures on it. She also expressed her thanks to them for allowing her to watch them in action.

Ten days later, Crystal and I were on the cover of People again, this time holding Little Jim; George and Summer were behind us smiling. The article was well-written and stayed away from the sexual relationship side of things, and only emphasized how I'd helped the Ellises in a novel way, loved my child, and the one we now expected, and that we'd be important characters in the childrens' lives.