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Things your therapist won't tell you

November 17, 2011
Posted at 9:31 pm
Updated: November 17, 2011 - 9:35 pm

Hi. I wanted to blog about a couple things while I'm still drunk.

First, to the anonymous reader who told me, and I quote, "Keep writing slut crap and keep getting 1's ... What do you expect? ... You can't fight public opinon." <sic>

He (or she, as unlikely as that seems) actually said much more than that, but strangely enough, those three mediocre sentences sum up the email exceptionally well. In fact, once all the irrelevencies are safely removed during the fermentation process, the email is actually cool and refreshing. It even has a little kick if you want to share it with your girlfriend. Who knows? Get her tipsy enough and you might just have children! So, let me answer the email here, since anonymous has the same address as Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, and God, for that matter. He answers, but sometimes the answer is no? Right. He's got Alzheimers, I hate to break it to you.

Okay, the issue with scores, uh...I could care less. That solves that problem. If you're giving me a specific score because of a specific code, then one of us has issues. Psssst...I'll give you a hint: It's not me.

What do I expect? I assume he means what do I expect so far as scores are concerned. See above. So far as download numbers go, I'm not sure. I figure by the time I have a hundred stories posted, I'll be able to form a reasonable expectation for the hundred and first, but I'll probably be wrong. So far as feedback is concerned. I actually expect more than what I'm getting, to be perfectly honest, but the good news is that the emails I have gotten have all been remarkably positive. -- Except for one. I think he has issues. So, the bottom line is that you should email me and tell me what you like or don't like, or just say hi, because that's kind of nice.

I'm saying hi to you right now. "Hi!"

And finally, I can fight public opinion. Heck, I can kick public opinion's ass. I mean, you shoulda brought more guys! I'll tell you why. Because I'm not afraid of being unpopular. If I was, well...I probably wouldn't call readers idiots, would I? That's not too smart if I want to be the SOL Prom Queen! But if I just want to crash the dance and spike the punch? Yeah. You see where I'm going with this. I think readers are afraid of being unpopular. Some of them anyway, not you guys. If you're smart enough to read my blog, then you're not an insecure idiot with a small penis and a big ass. You're a beautiful snowflake and I love you.

Now for the Bad News...

I've found a new love. My attention span is about as long as the space between these two letters and while I was waiting for the creamer in my coffee to stop swirling, it occurred to me that if one man is good, then two would be even better! I mean, I like men as a general rule, they're like extra-tall gerbils! So I decided I'd write slut faggot stories, since nobody else seems to be doing it.

I hate doing the same thing as anyone else. I really do, it's like some strange obsessive compulsion. Anyway, you got nine stories in nine days for free, so who's complaining?


edited to correct "tjhat" -- curse my twisted fingers!