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May 24, 2010
Posted at 10:03 am

New story, old theme

I've started posting a new story called Uncle Bob's Charter Boat, and I thought I'd make a few comments about it.

Some of you know I have a folder of files on my computer that I call my projects folder. Basically, whenever I get an idea, or a reader sends me an idea or request I think I can develop some day, I write up a synopsis of it, name it, and put it in my projects folder. Then, when I've finished one project, if I don't already have plans, I just start sifting through the projects folder until I find something that reaches out and grabs me.

I do this because I find that I do a better job on things when they reach out and grab me, rather than me trying to make them perform.

The only problem with this process is that sometimes, after something has reached out and grabbed me, it gets half written and then pushed to the back burner for one reason or another. What usually happens is that some other idea screams louder, or intrudes into my mind so that I'm too distracted to continue on whatever project I was working on.

So the half finished story sits there in my projects folder, pissing and moaning that it's neglected and whining pitifully every time I look at it and think "Nope ... not yet."

Uncle Bob's Charter Boat is one of those stories. It was started clear back in 2007, when approximately the first four chapters were written. Then, for whatever reason, it got shelved and it's been wailing and gnashing its metaphorical teeth ever since. And, after the insane joy of working with Stormy Weather on "The Grocery List (which was a HUGE success thanks to all of you humor lovers out there) I waded into the projects folder thinking I was going to have a tough time picking something to work on because following The Grocery List was going to be a challenge.

And I saw Uncle Bob's Charter Boat ... and I realized it was my older style of writing ... back when I was actually able to write a short stroke story ... and I thought "it's three chapters, and you can have her porked and pregnant in another three if you're a real man."

So I accepted the challenge.

I failed miserably, of course. I couldn't have her porked and pregnant in three chapters. It's just not in me to wham them, bam them and thank you Ma'am them any more.

But I finished it, so I thought I'd let you all see what you thought about it. A lot of people have been asking for another Uncle Bob story anyway.

And just so you know, there are at least 25 more half written stories like this in the projects folder. Some of them are as old as this one. So I'll probably take that stupid challenge again and try to finish another stroke story.

I'll probably fail on those too. They'll probably all become long, teasing, almost-stroke stories, like Uncle Bob's Charter Boat.

All I can offer is that you will be able to depend on one thing, though.

In the end she is most likely to end up porked and pregnant.

Though hopefully with a lot more style than that last sentence.

Thanks for reading.