I am not making this up. I'm usually pretty humble, even if I do say so myself. I'll go back to being humble in a minute, but I have to show you something first.
I'll print the body of the text, but if you want to see the original (plus a really nice photograph) then go to
Now, here's what it says. Remember, I'm not making this up.
Oscar-nominated actress Minnie Driver announced her pregnancy on Leno in March but has yet to identify the father of the baby. Busy promoting a country music album, the actress-singer talked about the speculation and the likelihood of marriage in the near future.
Today she's wearing tight black leggings and a T-shirt with a picture of Gandhi, inscribed with the motto "Be True", that would be baggy were it not stretched over her growing bump. Freckly beneath her chestnut mane, and with huge hazel eyes, she radiates the healthy glow of an expectant mother. She's prepared to talk about it too - but not before she's satisfied her daily craving for a cheese sandwich at precisely 11.30am. "This was an unplanned pregnancy," she confesses between bites, "but it's been very happily received by everyone. Which is great," she adds with a wide smile. "It's something I've wanted to do my whole life; I can't believe I've waited this long."
There are no rings on her fingers and she is adamant that she has no plans to marry before the birth of her baby. "Definitely not in the near future," she says. "It's not important to me. I don't think a piece of paper lends itself to the idea of being a good parent and I want to be a good parent."
She has so far kept the identity of the father a mystery, prompting much Hollywood gossip. She won't be drawn on revealing him now but she does say that it's not the man named in many reports, San Francisco musician Craig Zolezzi. "Craig's not the dad!" she exclaims. "He's my great friend and he's been so cool about it. I want to shield the baby's dad as much as I can because it wasn't his choice to get roped into all this stuff. It'll come out in time and there'll be some other bump people will be interested in and I'll have this baby and get on with my life."
The only clues Driver will offer about the identity of her "baby daddy" are that he is English, and "sort of in the same business", and that they have evaded detection because "he's really busy, like me".
Ehhhhh? How about THEM apples? I remind you, I posted MY story in January of 2008. The article doesn't say how far along she is, but if she's showing nicely, she could have gotten with child sometime around ... JANUARY! Ha!
I have a time traveling muse. This much is obvious.
Now, for those of you who are scratching your heads going "Huh? What the heck is he babbling about now?" I must refer you to the series "The Making of a Gigolo" The story you're looking for is called "The Making of a Gigolo (13) - Misty Compton. If you didn't read the series yet, give just this one story a try. You'll be laughing as hard as I am.
Thanks for reading.